The ordeal that Mr. and Mrs. M went through could only have served to strengthen their relationship and tighten the bond they both shared. The death of one of the twins must have been devastating to them but it must also have brought them closer together. This may be attributed to the fact that they shared a common pain and they were probably the only ones who knew what each other was going through. However, the fact that one twin survived must have pushed the couple to be strong for his sake. They probably realized that they would need a lot of encouragement and support from each other in order to deal with the situation.
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The lingering thought at the back of the couples’ mind was probably whether to tell the surviving twin about the incident or whether not to. It is not easy to hide such a huge secret forever and, at some point, the truth is bound to come out. At some point, in his life, the boy might be required to fill out forms about his family medical history and the issue might resurface. The question is, would the couple prefer their son to find out on his own or would he rather hear it from them? It would probably be best for the couple to bring the boy to light about the circumstances surrounding his birth in the hope that he would understand why they did what they did.
Depending on how old he would be by the time they decided to tell him, the boy’s reaction might be that of understanding or quite the opposite. At a tender age of say 6, the boy may be inclined to believe in his parent’s reasons for letting his brother go. By this age, his personality is still developing and he can easily be influenced by the beliefs and opinions of those around him. It would be easier and smoother for him to grow up knowing his parents made the right decision. However, if the parents decided to enlighten the boy later on when he is say 16 years of age, the situation could be much more volatile. There is no telling to how the boy would react, but one thing is for certain: he would feel betrayed by his parents who let him believe that he was born alone, yet he had a twin brother who died soon after birth.
At this point, in time, the boy might require the intervention of a third party whom he can trust other than his parents. His grandparents may step in to try and neutralize the situation by explaining to the boy that his parents had to make a tough decision. Enlisting the services of a professional counselor would also go a long way in helping the boy come to terms with the situation. This difficult situation could still bring the parents much closer only if they understand what the boy is going through and let him act form his own opinions. Forcing their beliefs on him may only make the situation worse (Pavlina, 2006). Most people who have suffered such ordeals more often than not end up trying to have another baby. This may be because of the desire to prove to themselves and/or others that they can have a second chance. The loss of a child often creates a void or vacuum within parents that they always try to fill. The birth of another child may fill the void, and make the pain more bearable, but the memories of the child they lost would always be there.
Pavlina, S. (2006). Understanding Family Relationship Problems. Web.