Going through internal personal conflicts triggered by various circumstances in one’s life is not an easy task, and the outcomes of this process transform people’s consciousness on a deep level. The same development happens to Jay Reguero, the protagonist of the book “Patron Saints of Nothing,” written by Randy Ribay. Throughout the narrative, he faces numerous challenges deriving from the impossibility to form an adequate attitude to the death of his cousin Jun. In order to do it, he goes to the Philippines in an attempt to learn about this event and thereby accepts this sad aspect of human life. Therefore, in the novel, Jay’s struggles are connected to the meaning of truth in one’s existence, cultural identity leading to misinterpretation of occasions, and the feeling of guilt accompanying tragic events of a similar nature.
The main idea in the story is the role of truth in adjusting to new conditions or, as in Jay’s case, accepting death. In the beginning, he unknowingly demonstrates a wise attitude to the subject. By saying that one “can only handle so much truth at any given moment” when refusing to ask about the dead puppy, he confirms the insignificance of inquiry (Ribay, 2019, p. 14). However, this occasion does not affect him much, and the transformation occurs only after Jun’s death. The anonymous message stating that “Manuel did not deserve to die” because “he did nothing wrong” instantaneously inspires trust (Ribay, 2019, p. 43). Hence, the emerged motivation correlates with the reception of limited information on the matter. The corresponding desire to “clear Jun’s name” and “not fail him in death” relates to it and explains Jay’s further actions (Ribay, 2019, p. 142). In the end, he admits that the truth was not essential, but the transformation already happened. In this way, learning about Jun’s addiction did not affect his memory of him, which proves that facts have limited value in personal relationships.
Another struggle faced by Jay and incorporated in the novel is cultural identity, and it explains the difference in the perceptions of Jun’s death by family members at home and in the United States. It becomes apparent after rereading the letters from Jun saying that “people are sick and starving to death,” but “no one cares” since everyone wants to go to America for “popularity and money” (Ribay, 2019, p. 27). By writing about the conditions of citizens in the Philippines, he expresses his concerns and highlights the apparent difference in their views. It is also confirmed by Jay’s Filipino mother, who says that “we can’t grasp the extent to which drugs have affected the country” (Ribay, 2019, p. 33). When viewing the events through the lens of the specified perceptions, one can easily discern the lack of interest in the circumstances of Jun’s death from his parents and Jay’s desire to know about it. While being unfamiliar with the former’s living standards, the boy mistakenly sees their behavior as indifferent but changes his opinion after learning the truth and thereby transforms his consciousness.
The third struggle is the feeling of guilt deriving from the impossibility to change Jay’s relationship with Jun. The former reflects on the letters saying that he does not remember their content and can “never forget: I left it unanswered” (Ribay, 2019, p. 22). He blames himself for not being attentive to his cousin as if it could have changed the outcome. Afterward, Jay mentions that sadness is connected to the fact that he “never tried to find out where he had gone” (Ribay, 2019, p. 27). This fact adds to the already uneasy perception of Jun’s death and shows that the guilt is not only in the lack of connection but in the absence of attempts to support his cousin. Even though Jay honestly admits that his actions would not have been significant, this understanding does not help him. In the end, he states that suffering alone is not necessary, but one should never “leave questions and letters and lives unanswered” (Ribay, 2019, p. 249). This aspect also corresponds to one’s transformation as the struggles portrayed in the story are the ones completely changing the person.
In conclusion, Jay’s suffering from the need to know the truth, the difference in cultural identity, and the guilt attributed to his actions change his personality through processing the tragedy. The first stage of this event is the recognition of the fact that truth can be meaningless when it comes to the memory of a person. It can only help accept it but does not affect the overall attitude. The second step, which is the understanding of the view of oneself with regard to culture, contributes to the process by increasing awareness regarding the reasons for varying stances demonstrated by family members. In turn, the third phase is the recognition of responsibility for communication, which is significant for relationships. Thus, the struggles corresponding to these aspects of suffering seem inevitable, but, as can be seen from Jay’s experience, they bring peace and transform people.
Reference
Ribay, R. (2019). Patron saints of nothing. Penguin Random House.