Mid-Life Crisis in Tolstoy’s My Confession Essay

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Life on its own is a complex notion that includes many stages, aspects, and problems. As a person passes subsequent stages of development, previous issues become less important, leaving room for new matters and concerns. In this regard, a mid-life crisis is a serious occurrence affecting most people who reach this point in life. As can be inferred from its name, this crisis emerges at an approximate middle point of an average lifespan when youth is in the past and the second half of life is approaching. At this stage, an individual is likely to reflect upon their past experiences and question their previous choices. Once enjoyable activities begin to lose their importance, and the future prospect may appear daunting. In pursuit of the elusive youth, people experiencing a mid-life crisis tend to make questionable decisions. Furthermore, their personal philosophy moves further away from materialistic matters as they reflect and discuss more sophisticated ideas. This paper reviews Leo Tolstoy’s My Confession as an illustration of the inner struggle experienced by a man in his mid-life crisis. While his faith-based solutions meet these needs, it is not and cannot be limited to the Christian religion.

Tolstoy wrote My Confession when he was of an age that is currently perceived as “middle”. In this short essay, the famous Russian author reflects upon his literary career and life experiences as he becomes older. By that point, he had already attained great success as a master of literature, having published several prominent pieces. However, as he overtly admits, most of this work served to make a living for him and his family. In other words, Tolstoy’s literary pursuit relied on materialistic motivation in terms of earning money and status. In addition, his career was a sufficient distraction from having to seek meaning in life. Authorship occupied a considerable portion of Tolstoy’s time, leaving little or no room for contemplating more sophisticated matters. Furthermore, amid the age when religion was of major significance for Europe, Tolstoy, as an author, remained loyal to facts and science. Ultimately, the author faced an imminent crisis of meaning at the figurative middle point in life.

This crisis experienced by Tolstoy originated from his concentration on literature throughout most of his existence. In My Confession, it shortly becomes clear that authorship was neither a passion nor a destiny for Tolstoy. Instead, he openly refers to it as a “waste of time”, admitting that he continued on this path merely for materialistic reasons (Tolstoy, 2018, p. 7). In other words, he wrote to be famous and wealthy and ultimately accomplished this objective. Nevertheless, as Tolstoy passed the middle point of his life, materialistic wealth had not ensured his full satisfaction. He earned his money and his name became well-known both in Russia and abroad. However, he began to consider the futility of this pursuit and the overarching purposes of his authorship. Having attained material satisfaction, he found his spiritual needs unmet. Thus, Tolstoy encountered a mid-life crisis of meaning, knowing what he accomplished but questioning whether it was worth it.

This way, the famous author found his previous satisfaction temporary and even futile. Tolstoy reflected upon his feelings and experiences, ultimately deciding that his life lacked a spiritual component. While seeking an effective solution to the crisis, he remembered that his previous steps were dictated by rational knowledge. Tolstoy (2018) inferred that this knowledge provided him with facts but failed to ensure the meaning of life. Therefore, he sought answers in the so-called irrational area, which is faith. Tolstoy accepted the tenets of Christianity, considering the central concepts and of religion on a more profound level. He became convinced that science and logic do not suffice to fathom life’s intricate, complex, and multi-faceted nature and its meaning. Consequently, Tolstoy expected religion to bring him closer to the true purpose of life, which was no longer limited to material goods.

In other words, Leo Tolstoy took a strictly theistic stance on this philosophical matter. For him, the answer to the meaning of life lay in God’s realm and the teachings of Christian philosophers. Evidently, as a free, educated person, he had the right to choose this path toward understanding the meaning of life. However, the ultimate presentation of theistic values as the absolute source of truth, meaning, and fulfillment does not align with the pluralism of opinion valued by society. For example, an atheistic opponent could reasonably argue that, unlike science and facts refuted by Tolstoy, faith is not substantiated by solid evidence. Therefore, this could be an instance of wishful thinking that does not provide true meaning to life. Instead, its overall uncertainty creates room for interpretations, through which a person can draw convenient conclusions that create an artificial sense of fulfillment. Furthermore, the desperate pursuit of religious solutions to a crisis of meaning makes people vulnerable to the malicious intents of those who wish to exploit them.

In spite of the general controversy regarding the solution for which Leo Tolstoy advocates, the very nature of this reading is thought-provoking. It is incredibly valuable to examine the inner monolog of a man who encounters a severe crisis of meaning by age 50. Furthermore, Tolstoy is a wealthy and famous person of his time, which indicates that neither money nor status provides immunity to such an occurrence. These ideas remain relevant today, as modern society’s mid-life crisis is a common development. Similar to Tolstoy, many people remain in an ongoing pursuit of wealth, status, and success in both their professional and personal lives. Nevertheless, they are equally likely to encounter a severe crisis of meaning. In fact, the likelihood of the occurrence is higher today as the world becomes more competitive, intense, and demanding. The current lifestyle, especially in urban areas, encourages ambitious people to be in constant pursuit of new heights, always raising the bar. Under such circumstances, more individuals eventually review their past experiences and realize that they still lack fulfillment and meaning.

As a result, the search for an effective solution to a mid-life crisis of meaning is a matter of paramount importance today. For Tolstoy, the key lay in faith and God, as the ultimate source of spiritual fulfillment, as opposed to materialistic goods. Today, this perspective retains its importance, as religion is integral to most developed societies. Nevertheless, it appears more fitting to expand the scope of solutions initially introduced by Leo Tolstoy. More specifically, he limits it to the tenets of religion and Christianity in particular. It goes without saying that the world’s religions are not limited to it. Furthermore, faith is not necessarily associated with conventional religion. Having faith implies that a person has strong beliefs that provide them with meaning and purpose. In addition to God, one can also believe in oneself, their family, interests, friends, and a range of noble missions from charity to social activism. Every person is free to believe in God, but there are other sources of faith in this world. In this regard, a mid-life crisis can, indeed, be addressed through Tolstoy’s solution, although it requires further development to be universal.

Reference

Tolstoy, L. (2018). My confession. In E. D. Klemke & S. M. Cahn (Eds.). The meaning of life (4th ed). Oxford University Press.

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