This work analyzes the abstract from George Orwell’s novel The Road to Wigan Pier. Specifically, it verifies the usage of connective elements in the sentences. According to the results of the examination, the first paragraph contains a range of key terms, which underline the general idea of the abstract. For instance, the author uses words coal and machine throughout the whole introduction, which recapitulates the overall content. Nevertheless, the sentences from the first paragraph do not start with connective expressions. The feature deprives the part of the flowing tone. Moreover, the sentence, which begins with he lacks clarity. Consequently, the usage of defining terms is ineffective. The subsequent parts bear a similar tone. Mainly, George Orwell did not employ any connectives except for the expression, for instance. Furthermore, the defining words, which often give a start to the author’s sentences, are vague. For example, the word may refer to several concepts from the previous sentence.
The actual improvement of one’s writing style, which is based on the principle of connectivity, can be represented by a practical example. Thus, in this work, we present the quality editing of the following passage:
“Doyle uses the fifth passage to crown his message of life and love through the metaphor of the heart. He compares different types of creatures with their distinct hearts. He examines the fragility of the heart by depicting it as the human beings’ little shelter that they fight to sustain, but later it comes to a halt depending on the choice of lifestyle. He insists that the heart has so much to treasure, be it in a lifetime, in a day, or a moment. He simply wants to show the reader the importance of life and letting people inside their hearts. Doyle passes the message that people should not be afraid or selective in letting others inside their hearts.”
One may notice that the abstract from the essay is marked by monotony since every sentence starts with a personal pronoun. The impression of speech flow may be improved by the insertion of connectives and defining words. Therefore, the edited paragraph evolves in the following form:
“Doyle uses the fifth passage to crown his message of life and love through the metaphor of the heart. Specifically, he compares different types of creatures with their distinct hearts. For instance, the author examines the fragility of the heart by depicting it as the human beings’ little shelter that they fight to sustain, but later the sustention comes to a halt depending on the choice of lifestyle. The central point of the work emphasizes that the heart has so much to treasure, be it in a lifetime, in a day, or a moment. In other words, the author simply wants to show the reader the importance of life and letting people inside their hearts. Consequently, Doyle passes the message that people should not be afraid or selective in letting others inside their hearts.”
According to the assigned reading, metacommentary serves as a distinct example of text improvement. The device targets the aspect of contextual clarity, which implies that metacommentary is usually used by the authors so that to recapitulate their points and to bring the content of the text to the readers. Specifically, one differentiates such metacommentary expressions as what I mean is, in other words, do not take me wrong, etc.
The practical application of the language technique may be illustrated by the distinct examples. For instance, efficient metacommentary use prevents contextual misunderstandings. Specifically, the following example serves as an illustration of the potential content delusion: “In the second paragraph, Doyle explains the mighty talents of the hummingbird, such as having the ability to dive at a speed of six miles per hour or fly long distances without stopping to rest. The author switches quickly to explain the dangers underlying this practice.” Since the author does not clarify the ground for changing the contextual situation, the meaning may be blurred. The application of metacommentary evolves in the subsequent passage: “In the second paragraph, Doyle explains the mighty talents of the hummingbird, such as having the ability to dive at a speed of six miles per hour or fly long distances without stopping to rest. The author switches quickly to explain the dangers underlying this practice so that to emphasize that the physical specifications of the bird do not serve as the point of the argument.”
The authors, who are inattentive to the contextual peculiarities of their texts, tend to omit full explanations of their arguments and suggestions. Despite brevity is a sister of talent, the unexplained point might spoil the passage. The instance is illustrated by two statements: “He compares this kind of life to that of a tortoise. He uses facts to indicate that with about two billion heartbeats, one can live his or her life in various ways.” It is impossible to trace the link between the comparisons. Therefore, the improved sentences evolve in the following formulation: “He compares this kind of life to that of a tortoise. In other words, he specifies that a human being is too lazy so that to realize the potential that is assigned to them by nature.” To sum it up, metacommentary provides an active device of text structuring, which improves its total clarity.