Introduction
Emotional intelligence skills are crucial for socialization and personal success. Self-awareness, self-control, and empathy are important emotional intelligence skills that effective leaders ought to exhibit. Self-control is significant since it means better academic performance, improved health, and greater success in life. Self-regulation skills such as optimism, self-awareness, and persistence are crucial in developing self-control. The competencies can be gained through an effective and achievable individual development plan for self-control. My inability to control myself in various situations can be prevented by developing a plan to boost self-control and gain related competencies.
Self-Control and Emotional Intelligence
Effective leadership and personal skills are multifaceted since they involve a combination of various competencies. The competencies involve the capability to make the right decisions, avoid environmental and social problems, and interact with others freely. Emotional intelligence, an emotional quotient, involves the capability to control and manage personal emotions and that of others (Segal, 2008). Self-control is an emotional intelligence skill since it allows an individual to manage their emotions and decision when provoked (Tarallo, 2021). Therefore, as an emotional intelligence skill, self-control can allow me to keep disruptive emotions and impulses in check in a stressful and hostile environment.
Importance of Self-Control
Self-control, as an emotional intelligence skill, is important to an individual for various reasons. Self-control can help me to effectively associate and interact with people with anger management issues. Conflicts are inevitable, and I may find myself in an argument with a person who cannot manage their anger (Kao & Cheng, 2022). In case the argument bursts into a fight, self-control can allow me to manage the emotions of the other party and mine. Moreover, self-control is significant in making healthy choices (Atmaningrum et al., 2021). For instance, having the ability to avoid unhealthy food such as pizza and those that can interfere with my body’s metabolism is crucial for my well-being. Furthermore, self-control leads to a successful life since I can make decisions that are beneficial to my career development and leadership journey. Having self-control means a successful lifestyle and socialization with my community members.
Challenges to my Self-Control
While self-control is important for my growth and development, various factors make the skill a challenge. Firstly, I have poor social skills, and I always shy away from expressing my opinions. A large crowd is one of my phobias, and I will do whatever it takes to avoid associating with others. Consequently, I am preserved and will always go with the decision of the majority, just to avoid being asked to express my ideas. For instance, I rarely answer questions in class due to my fear of crowds. My poor social skill makes self-control a challenge to me since I cannot avoid bad decisions as long as they are made by the majority.
Secondly, I have poor anger management skills, and I end up picking fights even in the slightest argument. I hate tolerating arguments with others, often seeking a means to win them. My quick-to-anger habit leads me to physical fights with many people. For instance, I hate it when some attack my individualism, including my skin color and cultural background. The poor anger management skills are a result of wanting not to look weak before other people. The habit makes self-control a challenge to me since I cannot tolerate people who talk a lot and those who attack my individuality. Poor social and anger management skills call for a need for me to adopt competencies that can help improve my self-control skill.
Competencies Needed for Self-Control
Self-control is a result of various competencies that boost priority and caution when making decisions. Although there are many competencies for self-control, self-awareness, persistence, and optimism are the most significant. Self-awareness is the capacity to reflect on me and focus on how my actions, thoughts, and emotions fail to align with internal standards and that of my community (Segal, 2008). Persistence is the ability to continue pursuing an action despite difficulties or opposition. Making healthy choices for personal benefit needs the persistence to avoid tempting situations. Meanwhile, optimism is having confidence and hope about the future and the success of doing something. Therefore, I need to be self-aware, persistent, and optimistic to develop self-control.
Individual Development Plan
An individual development plan for self-control is crucial for my success and social interactions. The plan will serve me three significant purposes: help me in defining my weaknesses and strength, identify the current level of self-control competencies, and understand the importance of self-control. I shall adopt an individual development plan that meets my personal needs and those of others. Consequently, the plan will not affect my plans and interactions with other people. My self-control development plan will be broken down into three steps: defining specific and helpful goals, accepting emotions non-judgmentally, and reflecting on personal achievements.
Step 1: Defining Specific and Helpful Goals
Developing self-control is a procedural activity that needs clear and specific goals. The objectives are crucial for monitoring my progress and focusing on a particular activity. For the self-control development plan, I have three goals, each to achieve particular competency. Firstly, I will double the number of college and home friends in the next two months. Secondly, I will reduce my weight by ten kilograms in the next four months. Lastly, I will avoid completely tolerating situations that agitate me in four months. The three goals will help me improve my social, self-awareness, persistence, and optimistic skills.
Step 2: Accepting Emotions Non-Judgmentally
My poor anger-management habit is detrimental to self-control and related competencies. One of my goals is to double my social circle, which includes interacting with people who are opposed to my opinions. Additionally, the new friends may attack my personality, making me angry. As part of my self-control development plan, I shall accept my emotions without judging myself. Moreover, I will try not to judge people who have similar problems as mine in the course of our interactions. Consequently, I will gain a positive attitude towards my set goals, putting more effort into their achievement.
Step 3: Reflecting on Personal Achievements
As time progresses, I will monitor my changes for development plan improvement purposes. I will develop a journal in which I shall enter all my daily encounters, including the number of new friends made. After that, I will make a summary after every two weeks to reflect on areas of success and failure. The summary will involve achievements of self-awareness, persistence, and optimism. Additionally, I will reflect on how my social and anger-management problems are improving with time. Monitoring progress will help in making necessary improvements toward the achievement of the set goals.
Conclusion
Emotional intelligence skills are important for my success and social interactions. Although I possess some emotional intelligence skills, I lack crucial self-control. The skill can allow me to freely interact with others, make healthy choices, and become successful in my future endeavors such as my career. Poor social and anger management skills are detrimental to my development of self-control. An individual development plan will help me become self-aware, persistent, and optimistic. The plan will involve steps that include the definition of desired goals and monitoring personal progress. Therefore, self-control is an emotional intelligence skill that can be achieved through discipline and effective planning.
References
Atmaningrum, S., Kanto, D. S., & Kisman, Z. (2021). Investment decisions: The results of knowledge, income, and self-control. Journal of Economics and Business, 4(1). Web.
Kao, F.-H., & Cheng, B.-S. (2022). Rethinking Interpersonal stressors: Measurement development and implications for stress management in Chinese organizations. Current Psychology. Web.
Segal, J. (2008). The language of emotional intelligence: The five essential tools for building powerful and effective relationships. New York, NY: McGraw-Hill.
Tarallo, M. (2021). Modern Management and Leadership. CRC Press.