Any idea or system of ideas drawn from life that one conceives as his/her own is regarded as the social self. Hedda (2005) defines social self as the persona which matches the demands of friends, family, society and community which a person develops as a protection. Within the general life, self feeling has its scope and the emotional aspects are well portrayed by personal impressions. The self is one’s true self and expresses one’s thoughts, desires, needs and feelings. It is always a conscious or differentiated aspect of individual’s life for it must be sustained by purpose and endeavor and it is reflected by how the individual’s character is perceived as well as mental contact. As revealed by Berger & Thomas (2003), William Shakespeare (the poet) observed that, “heaven divide the state of man in diverse functions, betting endeavor in continual motion,” and self-feeling is one of the means by which this diversity is achieved. Social self manifests itself where there exist objects of common desire which corresponds to the individual’s need of power to enhance his development. An individual creates a stable environment for his/her conduct and this happens as a result of inherent instability of the human organism. Man must direct and attend to his own drives. (Berger & Thomas, 2003) This strengthens the attentions and affections of other people where plans and ambitions which seem to be part of one’s life can well be understood. Social self and its derivatives should not be restricted to the lower aims of personality. It is difficult or impossible to act without thinking more or less of others. It is believed that the way we act or behave is usually influenced by people we have contact with day in day out. Where there is no interaction, there can be no development of thought and therefore we can argue that self cannot be separated from the general life. Thus social self can be said to be the part of the mind that is living and motivated in life in an effort to impress itself thus impacting upon others mind. It is highly unlikely for people to think about a thing that is not linked to others and which they are aware and incase they do then it is taken as definitely theirs.” Only in man does man know himself; life alone teaches each one what he is.” (Goethe, 1998) Social tends to lock everything else outside and consider the matters that only affect the individual. People regard themselves as the supreme in the society and the others do not matter as far as interests are concerned.
Socialization is the process of learning and understanding one’s culture and how to live accordingly. It provides the skills and behavior essential to the individual on participating and acting as per their culture and within their society. As noted by Berger & Luckmann (2003), it becomes impossible for man in isolation to produce human environment the same way it is impossible for man to develop as a man in isolation. It is achieved if values, social roles, moral norms, language, motives, symbols and attitudes are instilled in the society. Socialization predominantly in debates of family and education carries a lot of meaning. The blame on failure to develop socialization among individuals who contravenes social norms even after attending academic institutions is usually laid on family or the school. The manner in which individuals express their social identity have revealed increase acceptance of variety of family norms, in tolerance of variations and gender roles which is normally brought by socialization. It concerns the process by which children as well as adults learn from others. Socialization starts very early in life and it continues throughout one’s life unless there is some physical or mental disability that slows or puts the leaning process to a halt. People need to socialize because it is believed that “man is capable of forgetting his own authorship of the human world, and further, that the dialect between man, the producer, and his products is lost to consciousness.” (Berger & Luckmann, 2003).
Socialization is fun especially when we learn something new from others or when we benefit. At other times, it can be painful when actions of others inflict pain on us or affect our daily routine negatively. Socialization can be categorized according to how they are learned. That is, natural socialization comes as a result of individuals exploring, and discovering the social world surrounding them without the influence of others. Planned socialization comes when individuals influence others through taking actions that are aimed at teaching and training them. Both natural and planned socialization may start from infancy period. We should not forget that both planned and natural socialization can have positive and negative effects. Therefore, individuals need to learn positive features of both planned and natural socialization and incorporate them into our lives. Positive socialization is based on pleasurable and exciting experiences that we learn or obtain from other people. One tends to socialize with people who provide positive motivation, rewarding opportunities and loving care. Negative socialization is as a result of harsh treatment, use of punishment or anger from others. This makes one to dislike the people who treat them badly as well as negative socialization. Positive socialization makes one happier particularly after learning useful information that helps them to cope well with challenges of life. People may feel unhappy, defeated or pessimistic about life if the negative socialization exceeds positive socialization. To reduce the ratio of negative socialization then we should do to others what we would like them to do unto us. Though negative socialization is criticized Clausen (1998) observes that, through painful training individuals can be acquire necessary preparations and be ready to fight and die in battle, and rescuing others through enduring torture and hardship situations. To my opinion, this is true but I think fewer people need training relating to torture and hardship in battle, because majority receives more negative socialization than they need. Socialization can be a powerful tool for promoting human development. If people use wisdom that comes from valuable information about living and encouragement from others, then I believe they can develop a better society. In everyday life, we need to create as many good social experiences as possible for this will help us to live happily thereafter by taking our human potential and develop the happy and creative sides. The relationship between socialization and social self is that the latter help the individual to interact and socialize freely with one another. The two are inseparable in that for one to socialize he/she must be having ideas which conform to those of another. Social self therefore we can say is the one that makes or helps the individual to identify themselves and act accordingly. According to Berger & Luckmann (2003), social self and socialization are intricately interwoven. The experiences learned from the society determine whether the individual will socialize with others positively or negatively. Also for one to socialize he/she must have possessed thoughts, desires, needs and feelings to socialize and this are components of social self. To summarize, research have shown that socialization can have significance effect in the society which can either ruin or build one’s personality.
Work Cited
Chinoy E. Society: An introduction to sociology, New York: Random House, 2001.
Clausen, J. Socialization and Society, Boston: Little Brown and Company, 1998.
Goethe, A. The Social Self, New York: Random House, 1998.
Hedda, G.The Social Construction, Boston: Little Brown and Company, 2005.
Peter L. Berger & Thomas L, The Social Construction of Reality: A Treatise in the sociology of knowledge. New York: Harvard University Press, 2003.