The American Family is being under scrutiny as it is largely believed within academe that it is dysfunctional. There are various explanations and attempts at explaining where the problem lies. In this regard, there seems to be a convergence, roughly speaking, on the idea that the US family is loosely organized because of the cultural significance Americans put on individuality and independence. In what follows an examination of the issue along this particular line.
It seems that the American families are under strain because there is a lack of a normative structure that would provide the parents with the necessary tools to orient their families. Phyllis McGingley (1968) traces and the current state of the American family to the ancestry. She contends that “Young parents today are like the pioneers alone in a wilderness, threatened by uncertainties, no rules but the ones they make themselves”. The ancestors already lost the European norms of running families which were mostly patriarchal when they landed in their new homeland America. Therefore, the origin of the current state of the American family is old.
The newly acquired liberty in the new land-America made the notion of freedom an overriding concept over norms. Hence, liberty has ever since been more valued than any social norm or custom be it religion, custom, or common opinion (McGingley, 1968). This was further enhanced by the fact that families were organized as nuclear families. The Pioneers were not having any grandfathers or older siblings, having moved to the new continents alone.
The format of the nuclear family is still kept nowadays which intertwined with other elements reinforces its looseness. Already imbued with the spirit of individualism, a social trait in the US, there is a tendency that families move a lot, especially, young executives (McGingley, 1968). This frequent movement makes it hard to set some firm permanent standards as families have to reposition themselves with each moving; “Each transportation is a new Wilderness” (McGingley, 1968). Yet another element is the freedom that is given to children from a very young age. As McGinley metaphorically puts it, “No intrusive presence comes between mother, father, offspring. Where parents go, there goes baby to the store, the party, the skiing weekend” (McGingley, 1968).
The current state of American families is not the concern of academics only. People from various walks of life in America are aware that the configuration of family nowadays has some issues. Accordingly, a survey conducted by Harris Interactive about how people feel about the family in the United States shows discontent about the situation of family nowadays. Indeed, the survey conveys that a majority of 68 percent of respondents agreed that “Changes in the overall structure of the American family have negatively impacted America’s place in the world” (Dolliver, 2006).
In this discontent, there seems that the older forms of family strike nostalgic cords among Americans. Americans lament the passing of the married-heteros-plus-kids household as a dominant norm (Dolliver, 2006). This shows that the modern form of family, which is partially due to freedom and loosening of norms, is not necessarily looked upon in a positive way. Americans are aware that their issues with the way families are being run.
It is interesting to see that whereas there is not one archetypical set of the family is called for, some particular freedom-related issues are the locus of concern: “When asked if specific family structures are acceptable or not, respondents were more reluctant to be judgmental. The strongest disapproval was for a same-sex couple raising kids, with 41 percent saying this is “not at all acceptable.” But nearly as many (33 percent) gave that rating to a same-sex couple living together without kids, though a slim majority found such a household either “acceptable” (28 percent) or “very acceptable” (24 percent)” (Dolliver, 2006).
The particular issue of same-sex marriage betrays reluctance among Americans to accept anything under the label of freedom. This somehow shows that the evaporation of a normative set of families to be conformed with only has demonstrated some underlying conservatism within the American, although the problems of the American family remain unresolved.
One piece of evidence that comes out, though, is that in all the generalizing about the problems that face the family, it is hard to in fact talk about ‘family’ as there are many types of families. As a study shows (Richards), there are hetero families, same-sex families, divorced couples, divorced couples but physically living as one family and one house, there couples who chose to have no children, compound families, and so on and s forth. There is not one typical family.
People are not only describing what they do not like about the American family, they are aware of what ails it. Working parents are problematic because in pursuing their careers, they cease to focus on their children, as one respondent, Shannon McCauley, explains (Richards). The pursuit to own more and keep up with the Joneses comes up more than once in surveys (Richards). It is, indeed, a cultural characteristic in American society that people try to assert themselves through materialistic acquisition. There is a quest to get what is luxurious and expensive.
Still, in all family type variances and amidst all the problems that each family configuration faces, there is a keen interest in America in family per se. Accordingly, from a sample of 1092 respondents, the following result emerges: “People put family first: 55% said that it’s the most important thing in their life. And 89% agreed that “Starting my own family has been the most rewarding experience in my life.” But the family has influence beyond your private lives: A staggering 95% of respondents said that family life is important to maintaining a stable society–more important than education, the economy, health care, government, or religion” (Richards).
Therefore, the problems that the American family faces, regardless of how it is composed, do not stem from contempt or disregard of the importance of family. There is a problem in coping with change and how the family is evolving in a changing society. This takes us back to the diagnosis expressed at the beginning of this paper which is that the US family is loosely organized because of the cultural significance Americans put on individuality and independence. This has been demonstrated by presenting McGingly’s tracing the dysfunction in the American family back to ancestry. Moreover, the one major element that has forced itself to be discussed is freedom which the young generations have enjoyed and has contributed to the loosening of family. Evolving within a doubly free and materialistic society, people are masters of themselves from a younger age and strive to assert themselves materially, which has eventually contributed to the loosening of family ties.
Bibliography
Dolliver, Mark. (2006). Maybe the Good Old Days Weren’t So Bad When It Came to Family Life, Adweek, Vol. 47 Issue 42, p24-24.
McGingly, Phyllis. (1968). The New American Family, The Saturday Evening Post.
Richards, Sarah Elizabeth. The Changing Shape of The American Family, Redbook.