Should a boy be given an opportunity to explore outside the boundaries of his conventional gender role? The core is: how far in such explorations a boy may go?
I think I have a traditional point of view on upbringing. That’s why I’ll say that a boy may take some opposite gender explorations, but only consciously, somewhere at the age of 14 and more. Because at the age under 7, kids do considerable part of what they do unconsciously, just following the examples of surrounding world. An influence comes from different sides: media, internet, TV, cartoons, movies and of course the main source is parents.
Examples have a great affection on our conscious and unconscious states of mind. So when you are a little kid, the most of the time you do something that is shown to you, but not what you really want. You just choose something more appropriate to you of what you’ve been shown and claim that it’s your real will. Yes, it is your will, but not from the full spectrum of abilities or opportunities available to you. Your will is just a visible reality, an illusion, that you can comprehend only being an adult.
Friends of a kid are also a source of unusual actions, because they have their own baggage of picked up behaving examples too. You can’t protect your child from the influence of the outside world, but you can give it some basic principles of behaving and understanding the world. You should attend to your child with a great care.
Further I’ll talk about the boys’ behavior.
What I mean is that boys don’t have a sense of gender if they don’t have a male influence in their life. The main goal of upbringing healthy and strong man from a young boy is to give him enough of a positive male influence. First of all, it’s a father. His influence goes to the core of a mind of a young male. Also it may be an uncle, an elder brother or some grown-up man with a life experience who is a family member too.
But when the boy is more attracted to the women stuff like painting the nails or wearing a dress, it means that woman takes considerable part of his upbringing.
I say that letting a boy to explore the opposite gender is quite unusual, unless you want him to grow up more sensitive or feminine.
Traditionally, both genders have their own values and behaving models. For instance, history tells us that from the beginning of the mankind a woman was the keeper of the safety and comfort of home when a man was the hunter, that, who brings the food. A Woman was always associated with sensitivity, weakness and at the same time with beauty and passion. Courage, braveness, strength – are the symbols of a Man.
As a person with traditional views I say that a boy may explore outside the boundaries of his conventional gender or express himself in that outside ways, but probably should not.
Upbringing a boy with girl activity tendencies is fun for those who are fun, so let it be. It appears to be non-harmful for the modern thought of upbringing a child. But for me, the world might lose a man that way.