Modern age is characterized by the high level of stress. High tempo, constant access to information and necessity to earn money and other factors together create a good basis for development of different psychological problems. Moreover, human feelings are the same as they were thousand years ago, that is why people suffer from different problems and issues, not being able to adjust or make some steps to move on. The following two stories are connected with this issue.
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The first story tells us about the life of a gay man, who was the first to adopt a child in California. Bill Jones knew that it would be a difficult task as society was not ready for accepting and understanding men like him, however, he decided to take a risk. Jones adopted little boy Aaron and it was clear for him that it would not be easy (“Pain, But No”, 2015). They both loved each other, though problems still appeared. Aarons mother was heroin addict and that is why there always was a shadow of the same threat.
Being a lovely and good boy, Aaron, however, caused a great number of problems to his father. It turned out that he was addict to and this discovery also added tension to their relations. One day Bill was informed that Aaron had died from overdose. It was a great shock for a man and Bill still cries when he remembers this situation. Though, he does not regret about this decision and is happy that Aaron was in his life.
The second article describes the life of a mother and her son. After a terrible car accident, Sean Carter became a disabled person. After a crash he found himself in a wheelchair with a traumatic brain injury (“For An Injured”, 2015). He was not able to speak or perform some other actions. It was a horrible situation for both Sean and his mother. However, Jenny decided to devote her life to her son.
This decision, of course, changed their lives absolutely. Sean now is able to speak, typing letters on his iPod and this device voices them, while Seans mother takes care about him. Being in such a difficult situation, they both try not to despair, though it is still very difficult, as they confess. The most difficult thing for Jenny is to see her son disabled and wounded, being not able to live his own life, while Sean is very grateful to his mother. However, he also has some regrets connected with his life and future. He envies his brothers which have families and children.
These two sorties describe very difficult and dramatic events which were experienced by different people. They have a lot of common, though being absolutely different. Both Jenny and Bill had terrible experience of seen their children sufferings and being not able to help. That is why, it is possible to say that these situations touch the deepest and the most intimate feelings of people.
Having heard these stories, it is possible to outline the main adjustment issues peculiar for each of them.
The first story centers around a great loss and feelings connected with it. Death is always a great stress factor, which causes a lot of problems. It is very difficult to accept the death of a close person. The problem is even harder, when feelings are connected with a childs death. The course of nature supposes that children should not die before their parents, that is why it causes such a great pain and stress. Moreover, very often a person cannot adjust to changing conditions. Being accustomed to a certain pattern of behavior, he/she now has to act in a different way, being deprived of his main purpose which was to take care of a child.
That is why, such situation demands total reframe of the life and very often a person is not able to do it and accept his/her loss. This statement is actual for Bill. His tears, while talking about his son, serve as one of the symptoms of the stress connected with the adjustment issues (Adjustment Problems, n.d.). He still does not believe that his son is dead, that is why, talking about this issue, he experiences his negative emotions again and again. Moreover, he does not know what to do now as Aaron was the main sense of his life and it is difficult for Bill to adjust to empty house or some other changes.
The second story is similar to the first one, though it has its own differences and unique aspects. Jenny had not lost her child, though she experienced horrible feelings connected her childs health. However, as against Bill, she has a purpose to live. Though, her life changed greatly. The first obvious change is connected with the alteration of her role and relations with her son. Being a mother, she was also a women, which had her own private life.
Now, she is not able to have it as Sean depends on her totally. She has to spend most of her time at home, looking after him. Though, she says that she is satisfied with such her role, it is difficult to believe it. She cannot be happy anymore. Feeling of guilt is complicated by her shame, as she is healthy and has a desire to live her own life. Seans feelings are more distinct and clear than Jennys. He is not able to adjust to his new role and lifestyle. It was he, who should take care of his mother and it strikes him. Moreover, his inability to have a family is another stress factor for him, as he is in the age when this aspect of life becomes of a great importance.
Taking into account these situations and general importance of this issue, it is possible to suggest some strategies which can help to overcome results of the stress and become more stable. The first way to cope with it is to find people to talk to (Adjustment & Coping Strategies, n.d). It will help a person not to become isolated. Moreover, talking to other people, a man will be able to forget about his grief and focus on some other problems.
The second thing to do is to develop new habits and matters. This strategy is connected with the previous one as its main idea is to prevent a person from being isolated in his/her grief and thinking only about negative sides of his/her life. New hobby can bring new positive emotions which are absolutely necessary for people with adjustment disorders.
In the most difficult and complicated cases the help of a psychotherapist is needed and some cognitive behavioral therapy should be applied (Akutsu & Abhari, 2014).The reason for this method is, that very often the level of stress is so high that a person is not able to cope with it by his own forces. While previous methods can be taken as quite common and general, this one is more specific. Moreover, some medication could be prescribed in order to help a person (Adjustment Disorders, n.d.).
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Having outlined the main strategies which can help to enhance adjustment skills and cope with a great stress, it is possible to outline some obvious ways of their application to these two stories.
It is possible to say, that the first two strategies can be easily applied to the first case. The main Bills problem is, that he is not able to forget this accident, being isolated and not having some other interests. That is why, it is possible to suggest him to find new friends or people to talk to. Being involved in social life, he will be able to shift his attention to some other issues. New hobby or interest will also promote his recovery.
The second case is more complicated than the previous one. Though Sean has not died, his and Jennys lives changed greatly. Moreover, they are not able to show their real feelings because of relations that exist between them. That is why, it is possible to recommend them to make use of services of a psychotherapist. These sessions will be able to reduce the level of stress and help Sean and Jenny to live, being able to cope with existing problems.
Adjustment & Coping Strategies. (n.d.). Web.
Adjustment Disorders.(n.d.). Web.
Adjustment Problems. (n.d.). Web.
Akutsu, P. & Abhari, B. (2014). Adjustment disorders in Asians and Asian Americans. Asian Journal of Psychiatry 7, pp. 68-70. Web.
For An Injured Son, Caring Mom Is ‘The Picture Of Unconditional Love’ [Audio file]. (2015).
Pain, But No Regrets: A Father Remembers His Adopted Son [Audio file]. (2015). Web.