Friendship is the most important form of emotional attachment and interpersonal relationships. One can often hear that under the influence of the increased mobility of society, the acceleration of the pace of life, the friendly relations of modern people are becoming more superficial and extensive. Friendship is being replaced by broad ties based on common interests. Modern-day reality makes that process even more troublesome, as people have fewer opportunities to find friends in real life thanks to online social network expansion (Kelaher 2). Meanwhile, a person needs deeper emotional ties with other people. Finding a person who can give it to you and maintaining relationships requires enormous efforts.
Children are capable of forming contacts instantly, but adults are burdened with the every-day routine and are deprived of time they can devote to hobbies and friends. Therefore, joining a group based on interests or volunteering is the best way of finding people that will share one’s activities. Trying new activities also has excellent potential to bring new social ties into one’s life (Sedghi). The benefit of making friends in a group is that all the people there have at least one thing in common that can draw them together. Besides, friendship demands conscious efforts, and one should create time for communication. It should be noted here that talking nice about people and smiling produces the effect of a friendly person. As a result, people around tend to be more open and willing to befriend such an individual.
Speaking of individuals, people willing to find friends can be expected to start from themselves. Human beings are of interest when they grow and develop. The stagnation of self-development may become a reason to sever ties with the person later. Moreover, a person should know his or her goals in life, and interests to be able to share it. Besides, such people are supposed to be confident and open to new contacts.
It is generally agreed that the more time two or more people spend together, the closer they become. Studies show that people should spend approximately 100 hours with each other to become friends (Hall 1278). Therefore, shared experience is the key, and the next strategy is to spend quality time together. One should find free time on a busy day and plan engagement with other people. It is also beneficial to plan in detail where they want to go and how many friends want to make this time.
Asking questions is an excellent strategy to turn an acquaintance into a friend. To show sympathy and interest, it is advised to ask people to tell something about themselves and listen attentively: mere human support is valued much nowadays. Additionally, so far as people want to be needed, asking for favors may also cement relations, for a person will realize this way that somebody needs him or her.
Instead of searching for new people, one can consider reconnecting with old acquaintances. Such people, including former coworkers, neighbors, and college friends, are called dormant ties by scholars (Roulet and Laker 4). People frequently lose touch with these people accidentally. Maintaining a connection with old friends and finding time to share life updates with them is a good strategy not to lose ties a person already has. Therefore, making a friend is not an easy task for adults. A person should work hard to form healthy relations and what is more, not to lose it.
Works Cited
Hall, Jeffrey A. “How Many Hours Does It Take to Make a Friend?” Journal of Social and Personal Relationships vol. 36, no. 4, 2019, pp. 1278-1296. SAGE, Web.
Kelaher, Hope. Here to Make Friends: How to Make Friends as an Adult. Ulysses Press, 2020.
Roulet, Thomas, and Benjamin Laker. “Now is the Time to Reconnect with Your Dormant Network.” MIT Sloan School of Management, 2020.
Sedghi, Amy. “Loneliness Isn’t Inevitable – a Guide to Making New Friends as an Adult.” The Guardian, 2018, Web.