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The Concept of Same Sex Marriage and Child Adoption Essay

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Updated: Nov 22nd, 2019


The paper is a critical examination of the concept of same sex marriage and child adoption. A brief overview of same sex marriage is provided. Similarly, arguments supporting and opposing individuals in same sex marriage to adopt children are succinctly brought forth. “Adoption is a legal process whereby an individual or a couple presumes the parenting for another who is not kin and, in so doing, permanently transfers all rights and responsibilities from the original parent or parents” (Pertman, 2000).

Globally, it is only 14 countries that have legalized same-sex adoption. In most countries, the phenomenon is against the law despite the fierce debate to allow such a phenomenon to be practiced. The opposing main argument stems from the question of whether the adopting parents are in a position to be better parents.

In America, between 6 and 14 million children are living with at least one gay/lesbian parent. Most of the American States no longer hold back the consent of accepting peoples’ sexual orientation. It is worth noting that the courts as well as State agencies put in practice a principle of best interest of the child standard in order to arrive at a solution.

It is as a result of this approach that an individual sexual orientation can’t be used to limit them from adopting children least it is proven beyond doubt that the relationship will be harmful to the child. Close to 22 states permit gay men and lesbians to adopt children via state or private run agencies.

It is worth noting that since the 1977 Florida is the only State that had completely banned gay and lesbian couples from adopting children. The legislation of 1977 was passed in the wake of a campaign dubbed, “Save Our Children”. It is the following States Vermont, New Jersey, Massachusetts and California that allow same sex couples to adoption. Some States permit single people to adopt, others discourage it. According to Wardle, 2008, the American academy of paediatrics declared that gay, lesbian parents should be allowed to adopt children.

This provoked outcries from all quotas. Despite the fact that the proponents have strong arguments supporting the notion that gay parent should be allowed to adopt children, the paper will strongly argue why this is wrong by drawing and presenting ideas in a succinct manner. “Same-sex marriage also known as gay marriage is legally and/or socially recognized marriage between two persons of the same biological sex or social gender” (Boswell, 1995: 43).

Argument against same sex adopting kids

In the reflection of same sex couples adopting children, there has been constant dispute on the issue of their custodies. It has widely been believed that the children who have been headed with heterosexual parents are better off by far than the one from single sex especially from the gay parents (Limpkin, 2005). There several aspect that have been cited to affect these children

Sexual identity is one of the major concern that the children who have been adopted by gay parent experiences difficulties in the development of sexual identity. It has established that children who have been brought up by gay/lesbian parents are constantly disturbed by gender identity where they are unable to personally identify themselves as male or female.

In addition, they are disturbed by gender roles where they cannot be able to distinguish the degree to which different culture are regarded as feminine or masculine. Moreover, they are reported to get a problem of sexual orientation where they get a lot of problem in choosing the sexual partners. They get confused on whether to have a bisexual, homosexual or heterosexual relationship.

According to religion and science, kids are brought to the world by both a man and a woman. For this reason, it is only natural for kids to be raised in a family that has both father and mother as this is the natural order and perverting it is wrong to say the least. For this reason same sex marriage should not be allowed to adopt children. It is no doubt that human are influenced by a number of factors among them those people they closely associate with such as parents

First of all, we are all influenced as we grow up by our parents which means they may take on the same sexual preferences as there parents. Homosexuality is common place in society but in the natural order of things it is not normal. We are born into this world by man and woman not by the same sex (Chartier, 2001). Secondly, children have a hard enough time trying to figure who they are and how they fit into society as they approach puberty and in to there teens.

They don’t need to deal with teasing and ridicule from peers and there parents. Some things should not be allowed. Our society has become a joke and I will definitely petition against this. If you grow up and decide that you want to be gay that’s your business but it is not fair to allow homosexuals to influence innocent children period (Chartier, 2001).

Majority but not all of couples in same sex marriage practice some social ills that will be definitely transferred to the adopted kids. Research has shown that most of such couples actively engage in activities such as drug abuse (sniffing cocaine), alcoholism, smoking marijuana to mention but a few.

When the children adopted by such parent grow up, they have higher chances of practicing what they see in their childhood. Although not proven yet, it is asserted that such children usually turn out to be violent as they seek to defend their ‘confused identity (Ball, 2004).

Arguments supporting same sex couples adopting children

It has been argued that providing such parents an opportunity to legally adopt children offer such children an opportunity of being ‘loved’ and feel the presence of parents. When compared to those children that do not have parents or the parents are there but are unwilling to provide for them due to economic difficulties, those adopted by parent in the same sex marriage (SSM) are better off.

Similarly it is no doubt that child home cares are past their carrying capacity and service delivery to a larger population of children is not upto standard (Wardle, 2008). When SSM adopt them they ease the pressure in such facilities thereby making the government spend less while at the same time those remaining in such facilities are provided with efficient services.

On the same note it has been brought forth that adopting children by couples in SSM is in line with the American constitution of equal rights. Apart from allowing them to marry which in their opinion is fair and just to their commitment to marry the person they are in love with, providing them the opportunity to have children makes them to be just like heterosexual couples. Those in support of this kind of an arrangement argue that children adopted have higher chances of performing better in academics (Ball, 2004).


From the review of the concept of same sex marriage adopting children there both pros and cons of such an initiative. For instance among the strong arguments against the idea of same sex married couples adopting children include distortion of natural order, children assuming ill behaviours such as drug abuse among others. On the other hand supporters argue that the arrangement ease pressure on children homes, provide them with an opportunity to have parent to mention but a few.


Ball, C. (2004). “The Positive in the Fundamental Right to Marry: Same-Sex Marriage in the Aftermath of Lawrence v. Texas, Minnesota Law Review, 88 (1): 1184-1232.

Boswell, J. (1995). The Marriage of Likeness: Same-sex Unions in Pre-modern Europe. New York: Simon Harper and Collins.

Chartier, G. (2001). “Natural Law, Same-Sex Marriage, and the Politics of Virtue,” UCLA Law Review , 48(2): 1593-1632

Limpkin, R. (2005). “The Harm of Same-Sex Marriage: Real or Imagined?” 11 Widener Law Review, 11(3):277-308.

Pertman, A. (2000). Adoption Nation: How the Adoption Revolution Is Transforming America. New York: Basic Books

Wardle, D. (2008) “A Response to the Conservative Case for Same-Sex Marriage: Same-Sex Marriage and the Tragedy of the Commons,” BYU Journal of Public Law, 22(4): 441-474.

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IvyPanda. 2019. "The Concept of Same Sex Marriage and Child Adoption." November 22, 2019. https://ivypanda.com/essays/same-sex-marriage-4/.


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