Interpersonal Attraction
Social psychology is the study of how people react in social situations, how they think and how they feel. This study focuses on how individuals perceive, interact and influence each other in the social organizations. Social psychology is a section of the psychology of an individual; it tries to establish the correlation between the behavior of the individual and the environment which is made up of his colleagues (Wozniak, 1994).
Attraction is the orientation of an individual towards another and it may be described in terms of intensity and signs (positively or negatively) (Husain & Kureshi, 1998). Interpersonal attraction can be described as the attraction between people which in most cases leads to romantic relationships and friendships (Miller, Vandome & Mcbrewster, 2010).
Interpersonal attraction is important in the sense that couples in happy marriages have stronger immune systems than couples in unhappy marriages. The chances of survival of elderly people who have been diagnosed with heart related diseases doubles when social support is offered to them. Roommates are less likely to suffer from flu when they like each other (Topics on social psychology, n.d).
In most cases attitudes are developed quickly and in the absence of conscious awareness, thus we do not realize that we have developed an attitude. These attitudes are acquired through various ways which include; information obtained from the social environment, observational learning, and classical conditioning among others (Sanderson, 2009).
There are a number of factors that affect interpersonal attraction and they include similarity, familiarity, propinquity, inferences of personality, physical appearance, proximity among others (Washington University in St. Louis, n.d).
Propinquity is the exposure of an individual to certain person or persons. The people we are in contact with frequently have higher chances of being our friends; objects that we observe frequently become more familiar to us. Similarity is used in the context where individuals share the same interests, attitudes, backgrounds or personality (Northern Arizona University, n.d).
Similarity plays a major role in attraction, perhaps even greater than the theory that opposites attract. Similarity matters in that we have the notion that individuals who are similar to us will in most cases like us. This increases the chances of us initiating contact with them. Inferences on the individuals’ behavior are drawn from perceived similarity (Northern Arizona University, n.d).
As far as first impressions are concerned, physical attractiveness is the determining factor in liking an individual. Both males and females consider physical attractiveness as crucial (Northern Arizona University, n.d). Attractive individuals are perceived to be friendlier, sociable, extraverted, and assertive. Positive characteristics are assigned to attractive individuals; we tend to like individuals that look good (Washington University of St. Louis, n.d).
When individuals entertain the idea that another person likes them, the probability of liking them back is high; they behave more likable in their presence (Northern Arizona University, n.d). Affiliation is the human behavior of searching for the company of others.
Causes of affiliation are mainly due to biological adaptation, fear and stress. The objectives of affiliation include informational search mostly from knowledgeable individuals, fear reduction and social comparison with company that we share the same situation.
Affiliation has the effect of offering social support to the individual seeking it. The social support has four components which are appraisal, informative, emotional and instrumental support. Social support helps an individual to adapt to stressful events in life and it also acts as a buffer.
Lack of affiliation leads to loneliness and other health problems (reduced life expectancy). Loneliness is an emotional reaction that is complicated and is characterized by low self esteem, despair, boredom and depression. Loneliness can be either emotional (absence of an intimate partner) or social (absence of social support) (Topics on social psychology, n.d). Affiliation provides a basic foundation for long term health in that attachment styles embraced in the childhood stage resulted in later romantic love experiences (Brown, 2006).
Various theories have been postulated about interpersonal attraction and they include; “social exchange theory”, “equity theory”, “Rustbult’s investment model”, “Attachment theory”, “privacy regulation theory (PRT) among other theories (Northern Arizona University, n.d).
The social exchange theory is founded on the belief that how individuals perceive a relationship is highly correlated with the rewards and the costs of that particular relationship, the comparison level (their idea of what kind of relationship they deserve), and the alternatives (the probability of establishing a better relationship with another person) that is the comparison level alternative.
The outcome of a relationship whether an individual stays or leaves can be evaluated by deducting the costs from the rewards. Satisfaction is highly dependent on the comparison level. In a relationship, the alternatives determine whether you leave the relationship or not.
This theory is highly supported by research evidence. Although it received great criticism, the theory does not consider how the cost-benefits ratio of certain person compares to that witnessed by other individuals. This comparison is sensitive to people (Northern Arizona University, n.d).
The equity theory is one of the earliest and it attained moderate acceptability. According to the theory individuals in a relationship are at their happiest when the contributions, rewards, and costs are equal in both partners (Northern Arizona University, n.d).
Individuals wish to eliminate imbalances and thus an individual who is under-benefitted or over-benefitted should attempt to restore balance. It is usually the task of the under-benefitted since it is normally more unpleasant to be under-benefitted than to be over-benefitted (Washington University of St. Louis, n.d).
The theory of Rusbult’s investment theory adequately explains the reasons as to why individuals decide to stay in relationships even when they are not doing well whether in the short term or long term (Washington University of St. Louis, n.d).
Investment as used in this theory is anything that would be lost in the event that an individual decided to leave the relationship. The higher the level of investment made to the relationship the lesser the likelihood of leaving the relationship (Northern Arizona University, n.d).
The rewards, cost and the comparison level determine the satisfaction in a relationship. The satisfaction with a relationship, the level of investment and the quality of alternatives will establish the kind of commitment one will have to a relationship. Commitment to a relationship determines how stable a particular relationship will be (Washington University of St. Louis, n.d).
There are four different kinds of behavior that are witnessed in troubled relationships; exit, voice, loyalty and neglect. The exit behavior involves terminating the relationship. The voice behavior is characterized by constructive attempts and active efforts at improving the conditions. Loyalty involves waiting for the conditions to improve while neglect involves leaving things to deteriorate (Northern Arizona University, n.d).
In this theory the rewards from a relationship are weighed against the potential rewards from the alternative relationship in determining the satisfaction in the relationship. The cost of leaving the relationship and the investments lost in the event that the relationship is ended contribute to the barriers to leaving that relationship. The satisfaction in the relationship and the barriers to leaving the relationship determine the commitment to the relationship (Topics on social psychology, n.d).
The attachment theory is based on the assumption that the working models we develop when young affect adult relationships. As infants we develop two working models; towards our own self (self-esteem) and towards others (interpersonal trust). The attachment style adopted is highly dependent on these working models.
The attachment style can be secure, avoidant or anxious. In an attachment style which is secure, the individual is not concerned about being abandoned, has a great feeling of being liked, and trust and high level of self worth characterizes the expectations possessed about a particular social relationship.
Avoidant attachment style, suppressed attachment needs mainly because attempts at intimacy were rebuffed and distrust at others and high levels of self worth is the nature of the expectation regarding social relationships. In an anxious attachment style, the fear of unreturned affection mainly characterizes the kind of expectations about social relationships (Washington University of St. Louis, n.d).
Individuals possessing certain attachment styles hold specific beliefs about themselves and love. Secure individuals believe they are likable; they also believe that other people are good hearted and that romantic love lasts. Avoidant individuals believe that romantic love does not last and that finding somebody you can truly love is difficult.
The anxious believe that they possess self-doubts. They also believe that they are not easy to know and that few individuals are willing to establish a committing relationship with them and that it is difficult to fall in love (Topics on social psychology, n.d).
Attachment styles can change with time depending on the relationships context. In most instances the female who is anxious and male who is avoidant usually pair while the reverse does not usually work well. There are a number of variables that co-vary with the kind of attachment style adopted and they include; experience on relationships, attachment history (kind of relationship the parents have) and the experiences the individual has on loneliness (Topics on social psychology, n.d).
The privacy regulation theory (PRT) postulates that the reasons as to why individuals seek company are different. The individuals regulate the reasons depending on their need for privacy. The need for privacy can be operated between dialectic and maximization principles and thus they can vary at different times, and in some occasions can match the desired and actual level of needs (Brown, 2006).
There exists a clear distinction between loving someone and liking someone. Liking someone is basically a positive evaluation of someone while loving is more complex and involves attraction, intimacy, emotions and caring (Brown, 2006).
Love can either be characterized as compassionate or passionate. Compassionate love mainly involves feelings of love and affection towards other individuals but it does not necessarily include arousal. Passionate love is in most cases characterized by intense longing for a particular person and psychological arousal. Passionate love is in most cases is valued over compassionate love (Northern Arizona University, n.d).
References
Brown, C. (2006). Social psychology. Thousand Oaks, CA: SAGE publishers.
Husain, A., & Kureshi A. (1998). Dimension of interpersonal attraction. New Delhi: Gyan Publishing House.
Miller, F. P., Vandome, A. F & Mcbrewster, J. (2010). Interpersonal attraction.
Saarbrucken: VDM Publishing House Ltd. orthern Arizona University ( n.d). Interpersonal attraction from first impressions to close relationships. Web.
Sanderson, C. A. (2009). Social psychology. Hoboken, NJ: John Wiley & Sons. Topics in social psychology. (n.d). Interpersonal Attraction. Web.
Washington University of St. Louis. (n.d). Interpersonal attraction. Web.
Wozniak, R. H. (1994). Behaviorism: The early years. London: Routledge.