Introduction
This paper will discuss more the relationship between the family members. This sociological approach will be in pursuit of several objectives. The first objective is to demonstrate the relationship of the family members and the surrounding people and how they coalesce among each other (Carl, 2005). This analysis will also highlight the different roles that I am supposed to play in the family to ensure its growth. The analysis will not include all the members of the family such as grandparents, cousins, grandchildren, workmates, and classmates since it is not a socio-gram.
Discussion
The personality of my stepmother
My stepmother was a religious (Roman Catholic) woman and she used to wake up very early in the morning to say the morning prayers. She was the kind of person who couldn’t miss even a single church service. When we were young we used to accompany her to church every Sunday and she had also influenced my dad in the same. Her religious character was assumed to have come from her late father, who was a priest in Spain. Her religious character helped in the family setup since many of us are now staunch Christians except for my brothers, Philip Simons Junior and Jack Edwin who died at a very tender age. Due to her old age, my mother had become hot-tempered and she was usually moody. Although she was hot-tempered, my stepmother was always lovely and caring. We loved her very much.
How I got along with my stepmother
Being the oldest child in the family, even though adopted, I am regarded as a senior member of the family, and with this caliber, I got along very well with my mother until the day she died. When I was young, I used to run many errands for my stepmother and this created a good bond between us, thus making it comfortable for us to get along with each other. My relationship with my stepmother improved after I got married, this is because we bought a house near our home, therefore, making it easy for me to get closer to her. This closeness enhanced our relationship hence making me get along with my mother very well. I was generally able to cope with my stepmother apart from the fact that she always wanted me to do things for her as I used to do when I was young. She never considered that I was a full-grown woman.
Ways in which I am like my stepmother
Disparities of human physical appearance vary because of genetic diversity and environmental changes, many people take some genes from their parents. Moreover, physical differences or human looks can also be brought by race and cultural differences (Shore, 2006). I have a great feeling that most of my looks and manners come from my stepmother rather than my stepfather. In our family, I am the only child who behaves more like my deceased stepmother. My stepmother influenced me in many things such as my attitude towards people, my choice of clothes, and the type of friends I have. My emotional distinctiveness is more or less similar to those of my stepmother, given that my stepfather is less affected by emotions, which I do most of the time. It is also important to note that the behaviors of my stepmother are featured in me too, for example, my mother likes to cook, which I like too.
Ways in which I would like to be more like my stepmother
My stepmother was soft-spoken and forgiving. These two features are not in me because I am an outspoken person who rarely forgives people who do wrong things to me. It would have been a great thing if I had these two values which my stepmother possessed.
The personality of my stepfather
My stepfather is a physically fit person and he likes to exercise a lot. Though he is not as religious as my stepmother was, he is conversant with the Bible and he quotes it most of the time: mostly when giving caution. My stepfather is financially stable but he is a spendthrift, this is because he drinks too much thus compromising on the family projects. Due to his excessive drinking, he had a rough relationship with my stepmother and the rest of our children including me. When my stepfather is sober he is a very humble and accommodative person, who likes to joke around and he narrates funny stories.
My relationship with my stepfather
As said earlier, I have a frosty relationship with my stepfather due to his attitude towards me and other family members. I do not get along with him very well because he commands people around, mostly when he is drunk. He is an authoritarian head of the family who doesn’t like to listen to other opinions and his word is final. He uses the rule of the thumb (Carl, 2005). I have disliked my father since I was young because he used to punish me most of the time thus making my relationship with him to be rough. I am typically able to cope with my father even though he sometimes comes home very drunk. Fathers should be humble people to be proper role models to their children (Balter, 2008).
Ways in which I am like my stepfather
Some of my physical appearances resemble those of my stepfather, for example, my slim and slender body, walking style, and the color of my hair. These looks are easily observed in me and one can confuse me with my stepfather due to the walking style and also the tone of my voice. Moreover, I am attractive just like my stepfather.
Ways in which I would like to be like my stepfather
My stepfather had a unique physical appearance which I did not acquire from him; this is because he is not my biological father. In addition, he is very intelligent and he has a sharp mind but these characters are not in me.
How my mother treated my stepfather
My stepmother treated my father very well and she ignored or his utterances which were not positive at all. She used to pray for him so that he could change his behaviors of excessive drinking and misusing money. It was also my mother’s wish that one day my dad would become a good Christian and start going to church.
How my stepfather treated my stepmother
My stepmother was very kind to my stepfather even though he used to treat her very badly at times. His authoritative rule was also enforced on my mother and she was always forced to do things that were against her will. My father has generally grown old and due to this, he has now considerably changed.
What my relationship with my spouse reminded me of that of my parents
My marriage was a smooth one even though my husband used to come home at times drunk thus reminding me of my father and this lead to our divorce, but my husband was not used to ordering me around like father used to do to mother. When we are at home I usually joke and play around with my three children (Kate, Nicolas Jnr., and Michael Jnr.) just like my mother used to do when we were young. Something else which reminds me of my parent’s relationship is the way I was used to preparing meals for my husband in the same way my stepmother used to prepare them for dad.
Ways in which I treated my spouse like my stepmother
I normally treated my husband very well and I regarded him as the head of the family just as my stepmother used to do to my stepfather. I usually obeyed him, thus avoiding conflicts in the family, as he was the head of the family; this was also how my stepmother treated my stepfather with all the respect he deserved, whatever the case.
Ways in which I treated my spouse like my stepfather
My relationship with my husband was always that of understanding but because some behaviors of my stepfather are in me, I usually commanded my husband. When I was angry about anything I generally became arrogant to my husband just like my stepfather used to do. Moreover, I like my decisions to be final without considering any other opinion, even if it is the best. This attitude to my husband also precipitated the divorce, because he didn’t like the way I treated him.
References
Balter, M. (2008) Prehistoric Family Values: Science Now Daily News, New York.
Carl, M. (2005) Marriages, Families & Intimate Relationships: Boston: Boston Press.
Shore, B. (2006) Culture in mind: Cognition, culture and the problem of meaning. New York: Oxford University Press.