The Ideal Relationship Essay

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In today’s society, both men and women have assumed different roles in their respective families and societies. However, in most cultures around the world men are somehow more glorified than women. In such patriarchal societies, women are expected to serve and respect men. Therefore, women are brought up knowing how to serve and respect their fathers, husbands, and grandfathers.

Such societies have lately been the target of feminist movements. To most people, especially those in the Western worlds this manner of doing things is outdated and should be repealed entirely (O’Neill, Horton and Crosby 72). This has not had much effect because most patriarchal societies go on with their lives unperturbed.

This raises the question of what is an ideal relationship between men and women. In my view, an ideal relationship consists of clearly demarcated roles and responsibilities between the two genders.

Most of those in the feminist movement usually have a biased outlook of a patriarchal society. To them women in these societies are denied their basic rights. Therefore, when the women chose to cook, clean, and care for their husbands, it is assumed that this is against their will. This is not always the case. Historically, men and women have always served different roles in their societies.

This pattern has been in existence for thousands of years and even previous laws considered this fact greatly (Hare 17). However, there is a difference between being treated differently and being oppressed.

This distinction is often overlooked by most of those in the feminist movement. As one writer notes, “a misunderstanding of the roles nature has given to women will only take part in the breakdown of the sacred ties of the family” (Crawford and Unger 100).

A perfect relationship is not however built on fear between men and women. Men who are afraid that women are going to take over from them are misinformed. Careers do not necessarily interfere with gender roles. It is possible for a woman to assume whichever career she wishes and still fulfill her role in the society. For instance, the most common gender role is that in relationships men should lead women.

This is a good example of how gender roles are misconstrued. This is because the woman is not supposed to be a follower of all the men in the planet. She is only supposed to be a follower of the man she is in a relationship with. This means that in an ideologically perfect relationship the woman can be the president of a multi-national company.

However, when she goes home she meets her leader, the one who is supposed to alleviate all her fears and insecurities. Using the same logic, a man can be working in the lowest position possible but he should be able to lead the way in a relationship.

The mutual respect between men and women should exist without the pressure associated with the feminist movement. Men have nothing to gain by trying to keep women down and denying them even their fundamental rights. Moreover, women have nothing to gain relationship-wise by trying to confront and equate themselves to their men (McBride-Stetson 27).

While such issues may be good topics for public debates, they should not be in doubt when it comes to relationships. In a perfect relationship, it should not be a matter of debate about who is supposed to lead the other. This and other roles should be clear to both of the parties involved in a relationship.

In addition, this should not be a matter to be decided after a relationship has already begun, men and women should be in the clear about these roles right from the start.

A clear demarcation in gender roles ensures that there is good communication and respect in a relationship. Usually, these are the agents that bring about love in a relationship. When a man and a woman have clear roles and responsibilities, there is little room for conflict and misunderstandings. Perfect relationships are those that are able to withstand currents like those of feministic or chauvinistic views (Strathern 277).

In my view, in a perfect relationship it should not be an everyday quest when deciding who should carry out which role. For instance, if it is the wife’s duty to cook for the family this should be the case as long as she is present and healthy. In addition, if it is the woman’s role to bring home the bacon the man should not be influenced by chauvinistic or feministic views and end up feeling inferior (Walters et al. 89).

Statistics have shown that since the advent of the feminist movement, the rate of breakdown in relationships has skyrocketed (Haraway and Cyborg 68). This is simply because this movement is inconsiderate of what makes up a perfect relationship.

In a perfect relationship, it is not about what rights each partner has, but more about what responsibilities each partner seeks to fulfill to the other. Therefore, when roles and responsibilities are clearly laid down, the resulting relationship is nothing short of perfect.

Works Cited

Crawford, Mary, and Rhoda Unger. Women and Gender: A Feminist Psychology, New York: McGraw-Hill, 2004. Print.

Haraway, Donna, and Ann Cyborg. Science, Technology, and Socialist-Feminism in the Late Twentieth Century, New York: Routledge, 1991. Print.

Hare, Rachel. “The Problem of Gender in Family Therapy Theory.” Family Process 26.1 (2004): 15-27. Print.

McBride-Stetson, Dorothy. Women’s Rights in the U.S.A.: Policy Debates and Gender Roles, New York: Routledge, 2004. Print.

O’Neill, Regina , Sylvia Horton, and Faye Crosby. “Gender Issues in Developmental Relationships.” Family Process 34.1 (2007): 63-80. Print.

Strathern, Marilyn. “An Awkward Relationship: The Case of Feminism and Anthropology.” Signs 12.1 (1987): 276-292. Print.

Walters, Marianne, et al. The Invisible Web: Gender Patterns in Family Relationships, New York: Guilford Press, 1991. Print.

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