Love Essence: Raymond Carver’s “What We Talk About When We Talk About Love” Essay

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Introduction

In Carver’s short story “What We Talk About When We Talk about Love,” the author explores the essence of love, along with the term’s implications in a different context. As a reoccurring theme in writing, love is discussed from various angles: spiritual, emotional, and physical. For Mel, “real love was nothing less than a spiritual love” (Carvers, p. 114). In his statement, does the man refer to the spiritual love of God or another human being? Answers may vary based on individual perception but, undoubtedly, when in love, one is capable of interpreting the world from a more profound, transcendent perspective.

Main body

Love also varies depending on the nature of the relationship and the age of partners. “Still on the honeymoon,” Laura and Nick are full of passion toward each other (Carver, p. 119), while Terry and Mel do not share their romantic feelings so openly after being married for four years. Does marriage kill love or only take away all the romanticism from it? Routine and different life crises happening after the wedding may impact the nature of feelings partners experience. However, compassion, support, and respect communicated together with love could help to save warm feelings toward each other.

Love in old age has its significant distinctions, as well. Being together for decades, older partners usually have a deep emotional connection with each other because of years of cohabitation, children, and grandchildren raised together. Therefore, in the case of separation, there exists little possibility for them to find true love again. “I’m telling you, the man’s heart was breaking because he couldn’t turn his goddamn head and see his goddamn wife” (Carver, p. 126). In this situation, love is associated with care and empathy for the partner’s pain.

Conclusion

The last significant interpretation of love, suggested by Carver, refers to an individual’s obsession with another person. Can one love so much that they dare to kill another person or commit suicide? Though such instances occur, the feelings upon which the decision to hurt oneself or others is based usually include a self-centered component. True love should not hurt but sustain, inspire, and heal. However, as Carver noted: “What do any of us really know about love? It seems to me we’re just beginners at love” (120), meaning that the mystery of this feeling hides something different for everyone.

Work Cited

Carver, Raymond. What We Talk About When We Talk About Love. Alfred A. Knopf, 1981.

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"Love Essence: Raymond Carver's "What We Talk About When We Talk About Love"." IvyPanda, 16 Jan. 2022, ivypanda.com/essays/what-we-talk-about-when-we-talk-about-love-by-carver-essay/.

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IvyPanda. (2022) 'Love Essence: Raymond Carver's "What We Talk About When We Talk About Love"'. 16 January.

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IvyPanda. 2022. "Love Essence: Raymond Carver's "What We Talk About When We Talk About Love"." January 16, 2022. https://ivypanda.com/essays/what-we-talk-about-when-we-talk-about-love-by-carver-essay/.

1. IvyPanda. "Love Essence: Raymond Carver's "What We Talk About When We Talk About Love"." January 16, 2022. https://ivypanda.com/essays/what-we-talk-about-when-we-talk-about-love-by-carver-essay/.


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IvyPanda. "Love Essence: Raymond Carver's "What We Talk About When We Talk About Love"." January 16, 2022. https://ivypanda.com/essays/what-we-talk-about-when-we-talk-about-love-by-carver-essay/.

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