For as long as there have been two different genders, there was a difference in communication styles between men and women. It was evident before and later, when women began fighting for equality rights and fair treatment. Verbal and non-verbal differences in communication lead to prejudice and partially, it comes from the fact that men and women are different not only biologically but mentally as well.
Charles Greenwood mentioned that even looking at The Early Communication Indicator (ECI), children of very young age have particular communication styles, ranging from gestures to vocalizations and utterances (Greenwood et al., 2013). As a result, the unique nature of each particular style of communication comes from biological and social or environmental factors.
Women would communicate both verbally and non-verbally in a way, which the modern society describes, as feminine. This is due to the influences of male preferences and social roles. Since birth, both boys and girls are conditioned to behave in a certain way, which is representative of their role in society and family.
Girls are taught to be more sensitive and rely on their feelings while boys are given lessons in masculinity. The society expects a certain “style” from each gender and thus, the separation in professional and leisure-time communication has been created (Ashford & LeCroy, 2010).
Communication styles can be qualified as instrumental and expressive since each one is specific to males and females. Men are more focused on finding out the neutral and clear cut facts about something, which leads them to being more direct and assertive.
There is a much greater reliance on logic and the “instrumental” nature of things. As such, males are interested in how something can be used practically and in an application to the physical factors. One piece of knowledge or information usually, leads to another, thus creating a “thinking chain”. Women use a much different technique in communicating, as it stems from better insight into the matter of things.
Because women were segregated for such a long time and prevented from taking up higher and more prominent positions, they have developed a unique method of communicating in reaching their goal. Women tend to center on the person, deeper insight into the context and personality of the speaker and the general situation.
This allows for better qualitative analysis of information, linking it to the individual presenting the facts. Their communication is more personal, and is directed to the emotional side of the person.
Of course, it would be unwise to conclude that all men and women exhibit these qualities, as there are women who want to have all the authority and men who have profound insight, but the standard for the majority is upheld by existing evidence. It is interesting to note that professionally, there is a difference as well.
Desjarlais-deKlerk and Wallace write that healthcare professionals use unique set of communication skills to attend to a particular gender and person. Especially in rural areas, medical staff is well aware of the families, their cases and so, the communication style adjusts on a more personal level.
This type of communication decreases anxiety and develops trust (Desjarlais-deKlerk & Wallace, 2013). This can clearly be aligned to women’s communication style, as they develop a more individual understanding towards a person, thus connecting on a closer and more effective level. At the same time, it is difficult to say which style is the best because every individual has their unique technique in the interaction with other people.
But the modern times have made gender differences less noticeable with men being great negotiators and women strong fighters. This is much noticeable in the relationships that exist today. Sexual communication has stayed very much prevalent for centuries.
One of the oldest gender constructions came from the functioning of the family. This is where conflict might arise, as women were taught to have a role of homeowners, raising children and teaching children how to be more sensitive to the surrounding environment. Men were hunters and centered their life on providing for the family, so strength and calculation would be something a father would teach his children.
Even though the world has greatly changed, the separation is still noticeable through social and private roles in communication. Each gender has their own way of communicating in a relationship or family, and the goals or expectancies each individual has are also unique.
The majority of positions of power are still held by men, thus the communication style tends to be authoritative, depriving women of a chance to demonstrate their strengths. Women are forced to communicate in a non-demanding way, allowing the man to be in charge.
Often, the conflict stems from inability to understand the meaning behind the communication, as each gender bases communication on own understanding of others and the environment. As a result, each person uses their own style, and it becomes difficult to align to the thought process and emotions of the other person (Krolokke, 2006).
References
Ashford, J. & LeCroy, C. (2010). Human behavior in the social environment: a multidimensional perspective (4th ed.). Belmont: Brooks/Cole, Cengage Learning.
Desjarlais-deKlerk, K, & Wallace, J. (2013). Instrumental and socioemotional communications in doctor-patient interactions in urban and rural clinics. BMC Health Services Research 13(1), 261-268.
Greenwood, C., Walker, D., Buzhardt, J., Howard, W., McCune, L., & Anderson, R. (2013). Evidence of a continuum in foundational expressive communication skills. Early Childhood Research Quarterly, 28(3), 540-554.
Krolokke, C. (2006). Gender Communication Theories and Analyses: From Silence to Performance. Thousand Oaks: SAGE.