Introduction
A frequent argument of those who do not want to recognize the scale of the problem of abuse in the world is “Beating is a sign of love!”. This is especially true of violence against women or children — both girls and boys. Every third woman has been subjected to abuse at least once in her life, including sexual abuse — this is evidenced by terrible statistics (Greene et al. 632). The data on violence against children is even more frightening. When a child grows up in conditions of suppression, they may stop understanding when their interests are violated, take other people’s desires and thoughts for their own. In adulthood, the chain of deformation of relationships stretches behind the abused child, negatively affecting their family, work and friendships.
I have always been sure that in my decent social circle, it is impossible for things like this to happen. However, it turned out that I have friends who were abused at a very young age. I was particularly struck by the story of one of my friends who was abused by her father as a child. He always bullied her, beat her, found a convenient moment and molested the girl.
At the age of 7, he forced my friend into intimacy, the girl cried and begged, but he continued to harass. Such an experience, suffered in childhood, traumatized her for life. More than 20 years have passed since that moment, but the impact of these episodes on her family relationships is still palpable. She is a beautiful, intelligent woman who is unlucky in love because every time she unconsciously chooses men who look like her father. Many of my friends were silent about such stories in order not to face accusations and aggression against themselves. However, in order to fight violence, we need to talk about it; therefore, I think it is extremely important to talk about the impact of child abuse on adulthood.
Children who have been victims of sexual violence or harassment often face a wide range of mental problems in adulthood. Depending on the age, characteristics of the trauma experienced, temperament and resilience of each person, symptoms may manifest themselves in different ways. However, according to research results, everyone who has experienced child abuse has one thing in common – for no one the traumatic experience has not passed without a trace (Strathearn et al. 1239).
People who have experienced severe trauma in childhood are more prone to self-harm and cause themselves physical harm in adulthood, trying to cope with the emotional and psychological pain that torments them. Studies show that cuts lead to the release of endorphins, which give a temporary feeling of peace and tranquility (Buckman et al. 18). In adults who have experienced sexual abuse in childhood, the body’s stress response system is often too active. This manifests itself in the strongest attacks of fear, social phobia, panic attacks. The body seems to be constantly on guard and cannot relax. This causes problems in family, work and friendships, so people who were abused in childhood have a very acute reaction even to minor unpleasant situations.
Victims of violence, as well as war veterans, are tormented by obsessive painful memories and nightmares. People who have experienced severe mental trauma in childhood often try to find solace in alcohol and drugs. This leads to experiments with drugs in adolescence, which quickly develop into a destructive addiction (Greene et al. 631). A typical reaction to an early and traumatic sexual experience is hypersexuality (Greene et al. 632). In adolescence and adulthood, it can manifest itself in promiscuous sexual relations. Children who have experienced violence often find it difficult to express their feelings in words, so they manifest them through actions; they retain this pattern of behavior into adulthood (Buckman et al. 32). People who have experienced severe mental trauma often suffer from mood swings, irritability and brain disorders that can lead to depression, mania, anxiety and outbursts of anger.
There are several wrong ways to survive childhood abuse: trying to forget or pretending that the situation did not happen. Then the consequences of childhood trauma will be expressed in the sphere of health, family relations, and in relationships with people; it can result in alcoholism and drug addiction. The suppression of traumatic memories can also lead to suicidal tendencies. Moreover, if suicide is unacceptable for a person, the mechanisms of parasuicide may turn on (Wolford et al. 186). They can reproduce this traumatic situation of child abuse over and over again in order to complete it. Therefore, a person will subconsciously seek death and get into a dangerous situation.
Turning to specialists is not only not a sign of weakness, but on the contrary, a sign of strength and intelligence. It is absolutely necessary to turn to professionals, although it hurts, because a professional will touch on the painful memories. It is necessary to take the courage and responsibility to live it through again. When the protective mechanisms work, the person will become less painful, but this is an imaginary anesthesia. A person begins to change their social behavior in such a way that their life will become ineffective. When a person chooses to contact the relevant specialist, they become an active participant in the events and take measures to save themselves (Strathearn et al. 1239). Therefore, although it is impossible to prevent childhood abuse, it is possible to reduce its consequences by working with a psychologist in adulthood.
Those who have experienced violence often silence this topic, preferring to be left alone with their feelings. It is difficult for victims to share their experiences even with their closest ones, but it is important and necessary to do this. This is the only way to combat childhood abuse, which leaves horrific consequences on the psyche of an adult. All types of violence are interconnected: violence against children, violence against women and state violence. This topic is taboo in a society that relies on violence. The easier violence is perceived as the norm, the higher the risks for all groups of citizens. There is a lot of violence in society, it is largely based on violence, which means that this topic is taboo.
Victims should not be silent, and witnesses should not look away. It is necessary not to stop talking about violence because while nothing is changing at the state level, a lot is changing at the level of society. The more they say that child abuse is not a manifestation of love, the manifestation of parental care or an acceptable approach to the upbringing of children, the more often they repeat the signs by which it can be determined, the more people are aware of this problem.
Works Cited
Buckman, Joseph, et al. “Risk Factors for Relapse and Recurrence of Depression in Adults and How They Operate: A Four-Phase Systematic Review and Meta-Synthesis.” Clinical Psychology Review, vol. 64, no. 8, 2018, pp. 13-38.
Greene, Carolyn, et al. “Intergenerational Effects of Childhood Maltreatment: A Systematic Review of The Parenting Practices of Adult Survivors of Childhood Abuse, Neglect, And Violence.” Clinical Psychology Review, vol. 27, no. 3, 2020, pp. 624-634.
Strathearn, Lane, et al. “Long-Term Cognitive, Psychological, and Health Outcomes Associated with Child Abuse and Neglect.” Pediatrics, vol. 146, no. 4, 2020, pp. 1239-1245.
Wolford, Sarah, et al. “Maternal Depression, Maltreatment History, And Child Outcomes: The Role of Harsh Parenting.” American Journal of Orthopsychiatry, vol. 89, no. 2, 2019, pp. 181-191.