Children are considered to be a blessing for couples. Many long lasting relationships are usually characterized by couples having plans of getting children during their relationship. Thus, couples always seek to have children to ensure that they are a complete family in line with what the society expects of them. Children are usually achieved through biological means, but cases can arise where one or both of the partners are infertile.
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If I were to discover either my partner or I were infertile, then the best choice would be to remain childless or adopt if we still need to have children in our relationship. Thus, adoption would be a better option to follow in comparison to the use of reproductive technology to produce a baby.
The choice to remain childless would be the first option for us as a couple. Infertility affects many couples, thus remaining childless would be a natural decision. Based on statistics, one in six couples is infertile (Class Reader, p. 16). Thus, my case would not be unique in nature.
Despite this, there may come a time that we would need to have a child in our relationship. Adoption would be a wise choice. Children allow for the continuation of a family and its generations. Even though the child would not be our own biologically, he or she would be considered as a part of the family. Thus, the child would act as a fruit of our relationship.
We would also choose adoption because the child would act as a source of joy in our relationship. Many couples stay together due to the love they share with a child resulting from their union. The adopted child is loved because their presence is beyond blood.
It would become easier to think of the child as our own due to lack of information on their biological parents. This scenario would be different if reproductive technology were to be used. It is hard to entirely love a child brought about through assisted reproduction technologies (ART).
For instance, ethical issues could arise because of the use of a surrogate mother. This would bring about ethical problems as the surrogate mother may be exploited or undergo many problems while carrying the child. They could also undergo emotional problems because the baby would live within them for several months, yet they would not be expected to keep it (lecture, 10/22/13).
Another reason for choosing adoption is that children are important individuals that strengthen relationships between couples. Having a child while in a relationship is significant in ensuring the survival of the relationship. Couples with children are also faced with lower divorce rates in comparison to childless couples who are married.
In my case, adoption would be the best choice. There are many children who are taken care of through social services or living in children’s homes. Adopting such children would also prevent congestion in such facilities.
I would also choose adoption because it would be beneficial to the child. Children do not get a fulfilling childhood life when they do not live within a family set-up. Adoption would enable the child to live and grow with a father and mother, although we would not be the biological parents.
Staying in a children’s home does not guarantee that the child will have a comprehensive life. It is a fact that children require role models. Parents or adoptive parents are the primary agents of socialization of the child. A child from a children’s home would feel different from the others when interacting with other children.
This could have a negative impact on their behavior. Such children would not feel happy when they are aware that their friends have both parents, or they are living with single parents.
Adoption would be a better option since it would be a cheaper alternative in comparison to ART. Reproductive technology is very costly. The facilities and procedures used require substantial financial resources. The cost of an ART procedure is about 10,000 dollars (Class Reader, p. 16).
Despite the high cost, the success rate is low at 28%. Thus, the choice for ART would not be an alternative. The use of reproductive technology has also been considered to be a business activity because the success rates are low and the procedures used are experimental in nature.
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Moreover, future health risks that can arise from ART are unknown. My infertile partner would also require the use of a surrogate mother (Zoll & Tsigdinos, 2013, p. 31). Thus, more costs would be involved in taking care of both the mother and child. More costs would also be involved in taking care of the mother during the duration of the pregnancy to be sure that the child would be born healthy.
Moreover, the surrogate mother would also need to be paid for her services. The success of the technology is not guaranteed. Thus, ART would be a big risk that might not be helpful.
Adoption would be a better choice because we would not be limited in the number of children we want. Thus, the number of children we want would be dependent on how our finances can support them. Moreover, we could adopt two children at the same time and have a balance in the family structure.
For instance, we could adopt a boy and a girl, thus we would not be pressured like in the case of couples who have not been able to have a child of a different sex after many years of giving birth. Adoption minimizes the resources used by the government in taking care of the child through social services.
The child would also be able to gain more when placed within a family, instead of staying under the care of social services. Adopting more than one child would ensure the other child is happier. The children would feel like siblings and growing up together would establish stronger ties among all members of the family.
Adoption would be a better choice because it would save many women who cannot take care of their children. This could occur in cases where underage girls get pregnant and cannot take care of the child. It is hard for the mother to take care of the baby due to lack of finances and a young age.
An example is in Florida where a couple runs an adoption agency (Neuharth, 2011, para 2). Mothers who cannot take care of their children are allowed to leave their children with the agency. This ensures that the child is taken care of properly and placed with foster families that meet their needs.
Despite this, adoption rates have been on the decline as people have begun to embrace single parenthood. Initially, many mothers offered up their children for adoption due to the absence of the child’s father.
I would also consider adoption because it would enable us as a couple to carry out our parental duties. Many couples are together to accomplish this responsibility. ART procedures are far beyond our means and would take a long time to be successful.
Using reproductive technology would take a longer time due to the experiments and procedures used (Zoll, 2013, para 16). It is also an expensive endeavor and the results are not assured. On the other hand, adoption would take less time. We would have an adopted child without wastage of time and money within months. Thus, having a child would ensure that I am able to enjoy the experience of parenting.
I would also choose adoption or childlessness since reproductive technology is a risky endeavor. The unborn child’s future would not be certain because various biological conditions may occur.
Birth defects could also occur in the child due to the experimental nature of reproductive technology. It may also result in depression for the surrogate mother if the process is not successful. Moreover, they might be unable to get children of their own if complications arise (lecture, 10/22/13).
I have had an experience with couples that have not been able to have children. For most of them, the best choice has been adopting children. The specific case in mind involved a friend who lacked the finances to undergo ART procedures. As a couple, they chose to adopt a child.
The decision was arrived at upon realization that the costs that would be incurred to have ART could be used to facilitate the adoption and upbringing of the child. It was a cheaper and easier alternative for both couples.
In conclusion, choosing to remain childless or adopting a child instead of using reproductive technology would be the best option for us as a couple if either my partner or I were infertile. Using reproductive technology has many disadvantages.
It is expensive and there is no certainty that it will be successful. Furthermore, there are more risks that can arise in the foreseeable future. Adopting a child would be a wise choice because it would enable me to fulfill my parental responsibilities and the child would get a fulfilled childhood.
Neuharth, A. (2011, November 4). ‘Adoption Month’ is time to think of kids. USA TODAY. Web.
Zoll, M. (2013, July 12). Miriam Zoll: Pregancies for sale. National Post. Web.
Zoll, M., & Tsigdinos, P. (2013, September 22). Selling the fantasy of fertility. The New York Times. Web.