One of the main reasons why God created human beings was to ensure that all that He had created was taken care of. This was possible through man’s reproduction to fill the world through various generations.
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Since creation took place many people have used marriage as a way or reproducing to ensure human beings do not become extinct on earth. However, not all marriages last until death separates the couples as they are intended to. This essay aims at discussing the causes and effects of divorce in most marriages.
Divorce is defined as a permanent separation between a man and a woman who were initially married to each other. This means that when a man and woman divorce they no longer live together and have the right to get married to any other person (Stewart 7). However, divorce can be reversed when couples decide they want to get together.
The most common reason why many marriages do not last for long is infidelity by one or both partners. When a man and woman fall in love they devote all their love and energy to ensure that their relationship lasts for as long as they are alive. However, some people become tempted along the way and start having extramarital affairs with their neighbors, workmates or family friends.
Whenever such acts are uncovered by the other partner divorce becomes inevitable. Infidelity makes many marriages to break due to the fact that the person being cheated on feels that all the commitments and sacrifice made to ensure the marriage lasts are betrayed.
It also makes them feel worthless compared to the other person being courted. Infidelity breeds mistrust and the possibility of contracting sexually transmitted infections and this makes many people to prefer divorce than go through these painful moments.
Drug abuse has also led to many divorce cases as couples addicted to drugs become irresponsible and careless with regard to their personal lives and the welfare of their families.
Many people do not tolerate extreme use of drugs at the expense of their families and whenever such behavior is not changed divorce becomes the next alternative (Stewart 12). Drug addiction leads to financial constraints, domestic violence, health complications and possibility of contracting sexually transmitted infections that many people will not tolerate hence demand for separation or divorce.
Extreme poverty has also led to many marriages to break as means of survival become very limited. Most couples especially those who do not have children prefer divorcing as this offers higher chances of one being able to meet his/her needs compared to when they are together.
Unemployment due to retrenchment, end of contracts, drug abuse or misuse of office can also result to divorce since most people who are dependent on one person for basic needs like clothing and shelter decide to look for someone who has the means to provide these basic needs.
Infertility has also made many people to divorce as they look for partners who are able to give them children or conceive. The desire to have children running around the house making noise while playing motivates many people to make very hasty decisions and abandon their spouses who are not able to conceive or make their women pregnant for those considered fertile.
Any family without a child is normally considered by the society to be heading for a dead end and to avoid this situation they ensure they look for partners who they will raise children with.
Many people rush to marry without having sufficient information regarding who they are marrying. After marriage many couples will discover that their partners are not the way they thought they were before getting married.
Every issue becomes the opposite of what they had anticipated and eventually all their needs, wishes, demands, tastes and preferences become unmatched. They start feeling their partners are giving them a lot of stress and discomfort and their relationship ends up being very shaky as their personalities are totally incompatible resulting to divorce.
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Whenever a couple divorces on grounds of infidelity, drug abuse or infertility the partner who is a victim here develops a negative perception regarding his/her personality (Stewart 34). They feel inferior and less worth compared to their partners and the society.
Therefore, they start to feel that their value in society is too little that no one seems to recognize and appreciate them. The fact that someone has given another all their trust and hope only to be divorced later means that all the sacrifices and commitments made were never appreciated.
Some partners get married and decide to resign from their jobs in order to commit themselves fully to their marriages and families. They decide to be housewives and take care of their husbands and children while they go to work. Some men have also been forced to abandon their jobs and dedicate their lives to their children and wives.
However, when the marriages of such people fail to work and they get divorced it becomes very difficult for them to get access to basic needs. The possibility of them having made some savings during their short lived marriages is almost zero since they were fully dependent on their spouses. The probability of them getting back their previous jobs is zero and making new applications for jobs may take too long before being successful.
Stress and depression is one of the most common effects evident in people who have divorced. It is very difficult to comprehend the fact that someone is no longer living with the person they used to live and sleep with for the past few years. When people get married and stay with each other for several years they begin to become part of their spouses and start living their lives (Stewart 66).
The fact that someone is being separated from his/her long time companion is a bitter truth to live with. After divorce some people experience serious instances of stress and depressions that threaten their health if not checked in time.
Despite the fact that divorce is activated by one or both parties in marriage children suffer most in these families. This is due to the fact that most children do not understand the reason why their parents divorce after bringing them up successfully (Stewart 108). When provision of basic needs is cut due to divorce children will be subjected to malnutrition or poor living standards that compromise their health and education.
When parents go their own ways children are left in the middle of the tussle and are unable to decide whether to follow their mother or father. Children who are brought up with one parent face various challenges as far as discipline, food, shelter and entertainment are concerned.
Divorce is very common in the modern society due to the above mentioned reasons. However, if all attempts to save a relationship fail it is better for a person to divorce and get rid of a risky marriage than waste their lives in them.
Stewart, Alison. Divorce: Causes and Consequences (Current Perspectives in Psychology). New Haven: Yale University Press, 2007. Print.