Introduction
Being a good and effective child and youth care counsellor doesn’t always come automatically but rather through much training and understanding the strengths and weaknesses of human nature and particularly the kids. The article “Attracting resilience: Helping kids do better” presents the reflections of the author, Hector Sapien in his endeavor to understand the nature of children and how he would position himself as an effective child counselor.
His work has presented rich ideas, observations and conclusions that are worth understanding for anyone who is aspiring to be an effective child and youth counselor. It is, therefore, imperative to critically analyze this article with the aim of understanding the art of attracting resilience which will eventually lead to an effective and efficient child and youth counselor.
Attracting resilience helping the kids do better
The writer begins by introducing his works by reflecting on our own personal experiences in dealing with frustrated or disappointed kids who will fail under any slight amount of stress and blame ourselves for not rising up to the occasion. He introduces his own personal experience as a child care worker giving the predicament of Javier as an example.
Javier’s case is just one of the many painful, difficult experiences that most children in the same situation go through. Poor parenting, poverty and peer influence. He was reported to have become rude defiant quiet and reserved. He involves himself with the wrong group of youths and finds himself in the correction facility.
Javier seems to have the least resilience ever and will break under any slight stress. The writer gets a chance to interact with him and in the process makes some very important and interesting discoveries; he claims that “I was amazed and excited at how Javier managed his disappointment with such emerging resilient composure” (Sapien, 2007, 1).
I find it particularly interesting how the writer discovers the changes in Javier’s resilience when he is treated with understanding and empathy. Javier is reported to have felt better about himself and the people around him. It is worth noting that Sapien had to go through experiences with other kids and at times felt lost and disappointed just as the kids he was trying to help and also shared the experiences with the other coworkers who had gone through the same experiences.
Through interacting more with the kids at a more personal level and having the willingness he finally learned the art of attracting resilience. I find it interesting that we have these talents within ourselves and what is expected of us is to discover them and as he says, “become more intentional and deliberate in their use, while also finding and devising ways to stimulate or attract them in others” (Sapien, 2007, 1).
By looking at what the writer goes through in his journey of discovery of how best to deal with kids, it becomes important to understand that one has to invest a lot of time in understanding how to deal with different issues concerning kids and young people.
The writer had to go through “late night conversations with fellow colleagues, attendance to child care conferences, and reading about what other people had come up with, as well as a relentless survey of my personal history” (Sapien, 2007, 1). He presents his first idea of focused selective attention which, in my opinion, is of utmost importance when it comes to communication and relationships with kids.
I agree with him that communication is important but how we effectively communicate is even more important. The only way to attract kids in order to help them is to use the techniques of good communication which encompasses talking, body language and listening which should be focused selectively depending on the given circumstances. Targeting healthy positive emotions by initiating interesting and captivating conversations should be blended with careful calculated response and listening.
The art of prospecting becomes necessary for any meaningful connection with children. He personally did the prospecting by “watching, listening, and being emotionally sensitive to what was going on at any given moment while looking for particular elements in their play, personal stories, and general endeavors” (Sapién 1). I find it necessary to take time and constructively interact with the children in order to understand their strengths and weaknesses and look for the best ways get to help them.
Perhaps one of the things that help the writer to accomplish his mission of reaching to the inner life of the kids is the ability to remember the previously observed nuggets and timely application of the same. This means that to be effective in dealing with kids I would have to understand them, their history, collect enough nuggets and use them when the appropriate time comes. He claims that, “then when the person was having a difficult time I could use one or more of these nuggets to attract their increased resilience” (Sapien, 2007, 1).
I strongly agree with the writers thought about emotions and how they indicate the effectiveness of satisfaction in life. He maps need deprivation with negative feelings and need satisfaction with positive feelings.
I agree with his interpretation of resilience in terms of emotional needs “Resilience is the power of the individual to get back on track to getting what they need in their day to day lives, after being bombarded by some significant event and/or experience that is felt as jeopardizing these needs being met” (Sapien, 2007, 1). This revelation goes a long way into helping people develop resilience quite fast by bringing in the emotions that have the potential of restoring good feelings and hope.
The law of attraction arguably speaks for itself. The writer has it that “Attraction involves thinking, doing, saying and feeling certain ways that attract certain desirable qualities such as resilience” (Sapién 1). This simply means that one is more likely to achieve tremendous results by thinking, acting and being involved in activities and experiences that are resourceful in resurrecting and bringing back to life experiences of resilience.
It also means that we can’t simply give what we don’t have and as such we should internalize within ourselves and create emotions of courage, bravery and resilience and only after that will we be able to project the same to the kids who look upon us for guidance and consolation. This can be seen as the key prerequisite for an effective counselor.
The article is particularly important for anyone dreaming of becoming an effective child and youth care counsellor. The art of taking time to understand what the kids have gone through seems to be the first step towards attracting them. The article stresses the importance of time investment in the right experiences such as spending time with the kids, reading resourceful materials and discussing experiences with other counsellors.
The article also stressed the importance of the theory of attraction whereby thinking, doing, saying and feeling certain ways that attract certain desirable qualities such as resilience will make one an effective counselor.
The article also stresses the importance of bringing in the emotions that have the potential of restoring good feelings and hope which in my opinion makes one valuable counselor since the youth and the kids look at us for guidance and source of hope.
The need for precision in terms of identifying the key areas to touch to have the largest impact on your target is particularly stressed in the article. He claims that “a nutritionist identifies those foods that are most physiologically nutritious” (Sapien, 2007, 1). In the same way a counselor must be in a position to deliver quality.
Conclusion
Becoming a child and youth care counsellor is not a simple task and calls for much preparedness and willingness. The article has been critically analysed and found to be of great importance in modelling an effective child and youth care counsellor.
It has stressed the importance of the theory of attraction, need for precision in terms of identifying the key areas to touch, art of taking time to understand what the kids have gone through and the concept of bringing in the emotions that have the potential of restoring good feelings and hope. The importance of listening, and being emotionally sensitive to what was going on at any given moment has also been stressed. The article is highly enriching and can be recommended for anyone aspiring to be a child and youth care counsellor.
Reference
Sapién, H. (2007). Attracting resilience: Helping kids do better. Cyc-net. Web.