Anger involves a very potent process involving emotional feelings that always need to be expressed. Though many people may not know this, anger is essential in healthy balanced life in all human beings. However, the difference in effects of anger on the affected person as well as those close to the person depends greatly on how that person expresses it.
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Expression of anger is not necessarily violence, but requires effective management and expression which is basically a process. Understanding anger is the initial and very critical point in its management as well as expression. This involves understanding and examining of the real cause of the anger. Identify the situation under which you got angry and try to look at the feelings that made you angry.
Understanding anger helps individuals to avoid any of the two scenarios that many people tend to use when they are angry; blaming anger and justifying anger. Blaming anger occurs when a person got angry and as a result he does something unpleasant. Later, the person uses anger as the cause of his actions. We have all heard “I am sorry I was angry”. This is a good example of blaming anger.
Justifying anger is some kind of showing proof that a person has the right to react in a specific manner. For instance, a person may get angry and try to do something unpleasant but if people try to stop him, the angry person will try to show the others that he has to react because he is angry. It is therefore very important to understand what made one angry to avoid later regrets over one’s actions (Thomas 1).
Expression of anger is very important and usual to all men. However, anger should be expressed in a healthy way that allows all involved parties to be in a situation that promotes their interests. Direct and straight forward discussion (should not be verbally aggressive) of the problem at hand is always the best way to handle anger rather than getting physically violent.
This helps a lot in getting the anger out and in a clear way rather than keeping it to oneself. Approaching the people involved with the anger is a great move since it helps one understand the cause of the anger and gives the involved parties the opportunity to address the issue in a proper way to avoid grudges.
Assertive approach in dealing with anger also enables the people involved to express their expectations from one another to prevent similar occurrences. For those who cannot remain non physical when angry, they should do so intelligently and safely. Kicking a pillow is a good example rather than beating up the other person or even oneself. Professionals have suggested that angry people can divert their attention to tasks that require physical energy.
This is based on the fact that angry people tend to be more energetic and they should therefore avoid physical attack to other people as much as possible. This helps prevent physical beatings and on the other hand it promotes productive activities such as sports (Gay 1).
Every person gets angry at some point but the way that we express and deal with it is what matters. Identification of the cause of anger is the root towards a managed expression of anger that is aimed at promoting our personal and other people’s needs and interests.
Gay, Bobbi. “Processing Emotions Effectively”. 2006 – January 27, 2011, <http://www.lightseed.com/articles/processing_emotions.htm>
Thomas, Patrick. “Diffusing Anger”. 2002 – January 27, 2011. Web.