Introduction
Intercultural communication has become an essential part of our everyday lives, owing to the increasingly dynamic and diverse societies. Globalization and open borders continue to encourage movement and consequently, interaction between different cultures. The increased diversity demands that we develop the appropriate communication and interrelation skills to effectively interact with individuals from other cultures. Maintaining a functional relationship with my Chinese friend has revealed the significance of our differences in perceptions of identity and effective communication, and how these diversities can affect relations. The friendship has also revealed the influence of culture on our communication styles, perceptions of identity, and resolution of internal tensions.
Discussion
The Chinese culture has a different communication style from mine because it emphasizes on non-verbal communication and the need to maintain harmonious relations, while avoiding conflict. Unlike my culture where we believe in expressing ourselves fully to make our feelings and opinions known, the Chinese prefer to use an ambiguous language, expressions, posture, and voice intonation to achieve the same purpose. For example, instead of saying a direct “no” when in disagreement, my friend makes a facial expression that indicates he is now willing to engage further in a conversation. Wood (2020) notes that diverse communication style is one of the sources of pressures in friendship. Therefore, it is imperative for friends to understand each other’s communication style to achieve effective communication (Sundararajan, 2020). I have learned to pay more attention to my friend’s facial expressions and gestures as a way of achieving effective communication.
Chinese perceptions of identity are similar to the American perceptions in that they are based on traditional values, although these ideals are different. For example, the American culture is based on the traditional beliefs of freedom, classism and wealth, and equal opportunity. On the other hand, the Chinese uphold the ideals of harmony, courtesy, wisdom, honesty, and loyalty (Pan et al., 2019). These values are embedded in the Chinese culture’s communication styles. Harmony is an esteemed principle in the Chinese culture, and they therefore adopt communication styles that preserve it. For example, the Chinese avoid altercations as a way of maintaining harmony. I would apply the concepts of conflict resolution to include my friend in my life. Engaging in dual perspectives is among the concepts I would apply to improve communication of my ideas and needs to the Chinese friend. I would also ensure to learn more about the Chinese culture to better understand and honor my friend’s ideas. Learning more about my friend’s culture would help me avoid controversial and unpleasant topics that may strain the friendship, while ensuring I maintain respect for the colleague’s perception of identity.
Conflict resolution is another important concept that depicts our differences in identity perceptions. The Chinese are more likely to adopt avoidance and passive resistance as conflict resolution strategies, while Americans adopt negotiations and deal-making as the preferred conflict resolution measures. This perception can influence effective communication adversely in that it is more difficult to resolve a conflict when one side does not engage in negotiations regarding the disagreement. Therefore, I would adjust my perceptions and sense of identity to include my Chinese colleague as a friend by avoiding conflict. However, in the event of conflict, I would ensure that I allow my friend sufficient time and space to voice their opinions. I would best communicate my ideas by adopting the concept of dual perspective, which refers to the ability to understand our beliefs and perspectives, and those of others (Wood, 2020). Adopting this approach would facilitate an unstrained and genuine dialogue.
Conclusion
Effective communication with a person from a different culture is essential in maintaining functional friendships. Analyzing my friendship with a Chinese colleague demonstrated the importance of understanding other peoples’ cultures and how it affects communication. The exercise was crucial in revealing how I can adjust my perceptions and sense of identity to facilitate effective communication with the friend.
References
Pan, Z., Chaffee, S. H., Chu, G. C., & Ju, Y. (2019). To see ourselves: Comparing traditional Chinese and American cultural values. Routledge.
Sundararajan, L. (2020). A history of the concepts of harmony in Chinese culture. In Oxford Research Encyclopedia of Psychology.
Wood, J. (2020). Interpersonal communication: Everyday encounters. (9th ed.). Cengage.