Case Summary
Mark invited Susan to a party, and she agreed to have fun with some friends and acquaintances. Meanwhile, Mark paid close attention to the girl, and she was pleasant to him. From Susan’s perspective, she was being polite to Mark because he had been respectful to her and had extended an invitation. In return, Mark thought that Susan accepted his sympathy, and they could meet as a couple.
After the party, Susan accepted Mark’s Facebook friend request. A few days later, she noticed that Mark was writing posts about his love for her. Susan realized that the boy had misunderstood her friendliness at the party and decided to clarify her relationship with Mark.
Correspondingly, she wrote that she had had fun and was friendly, but their relationship could not be romantic. After that, she unfriended Mark to establish clear boundaries and prevent him from getting false hope. As a result, Mark and Susan formed negative impressions of each other’s behavior.
Scientific Sources
Bamford (2015) explores Earp’s analysis and suggests that the neurochemical modulation of love is a key issue in contemporary neuroethics. Accordingly, Bamford (2015) argues that love should also be considered in medicine. Moreover, the author suggests that more attention should be paid to social and political factors that affect the neurochemical modulation of love (Bamford, 2015).
Furthermore, the author argues that the science of neuroethics has not sufficiently explored the concept of love; thus, further research is needed to address the issues. In addition, there is a special need for research in this area, given the idea of developing a medication for unrequited love. Consequently, the author concludes that neuroethics is a solution to the problem of unrequited feelings.
It is essential to note that Hu and Kong (2023) investigated individuals’ responses to being informed about romantic feelings or unrequited love. The authors conducted a study involving over 300 college students in China. They named a media figure with whom they had romantic feelings and described their reaction when that figure announced their relationship (Hu & Kong, 2023).
The participants also named a person they knew personally with whom they felt unrequited love. The participants then reported feeling negative emotions about being in a relationship with someone they knew personally, and it was harder for them to overcome the negative feelings than when they learned that people in the media were in a relationship. Thus, Hu & Kong (2023) concluded that the reaction to unrequited love is stronger when individuals interact more with one another.
Social Psychological Theory
Scientists have studied unrequited love and its associated reactions, and a theory has been developed to explain this phenomenon. According to the unrequited love theory, people often reject romantic feelings due to internal or external factors (Baumeister & Bushman, 2020). In Susan’s case, she refused Mark because of her inner conviction that they did not know each other well enough, and it was not appropriate to read about her on Facebook.
In fact, the theory of unrequited love states that it occurs when one person expresses feelings and the other rejects them. In Mark’s case, he did not express his feelings to Susan personally but wrote about her in his account, and she might not have noticed. Therefore, Mark was not expressing his feelings correctly to establish social contact with Susan and start a relationship.
However, cases of denied feelings can hurt people. According to the rejection theory, failure is a strike against a person’s self-esteem (Baumeister & Bushman, 2020). In Mark’s case, this is precisely the case because he publicly expressed his feelings, and now all his friends know that Susan did not reciprocate. As a result, Mark and Susan’s story is not typical, but it does qualify as an instance of unrequited love.
Connection to the Study
It is crucial to emphasize that neuroethics is a science that aims to find a cure for love. Accordingly, Bamford (2015) argues that love feelings should not be separated from medical science. This is important because, according to the unrequited love theory, unrequited love can lead individuals to persecute others or even develop psychological problems (Baumeister & Bushman, 2020). Therefore, medical help is essential in severe cases of unrequited love.
Moreover, Hu & Kong (2023) investigate the strength of romantic feelings and what factors underlie them. Their findings align with the unrequited love theory, which posits that individuals who are unable to express their emotions for an extended period tend to experience rejection more intensely. Hence, social psychology research is related to social psychological theory.
Ethical Consideration
Meanwhile, unrequited love presents numerous ethical issues that individuals struggle to resolve. For example, Susan thinks it is wrong for Mark to publicly post about his feelings for her when she is not aware of them. Mark, on the other hand, considers Susan’s reaction adverse because she had been friendly with him earlier at the party. According to ethical theory, it is necessary to respect each other’s boundaries and personal space (Baumeister & Bushman, 2020). Thus, because Mark’s feelings were brought into the public space, Susan’s speech became especially painful for him.
Critical Thinking
Susan and Mark started their conversation on the right foot and had a great time together at the party. They became friends on Facebook and, over time, could continue to get to know each other better. During this communication, Susan might have developed feelings for Mark, given that she was outraged by Mark’s leash because they did not know each other well. From a critical conceptualization perspective, if Mark had not been so active on social media immediately after the party together, Susan might have agreed to date him (Baumeister & Bushman, 2020). Furthermore, Susan criticized Mark’s actions not because she did not find him attractive, but because he did not conduct himself as she anticipated.
Conclusion
In summary, unrequited love is a problem people face, and medical science seeks to address it to improve individuals’ inner feelings after rejection. In the case of Susan and Mark, the girl rejected him because of his proactive approach on social media, which she did not know well enough to appreciate. If Mark had chosen a different tactic for expressing his feelings, he might not have received a decline from Susan. As a result, their communication ended with the termination of their friendship on Facebook and resentment on both sides. Therefore, the theory of unrequited love, along with ethical and critical perspectives, explains people’s perceptions of love rejection and the feelings associated with it.
References
Bamford, R. (2015). Unrequited: Neurochemical enhancement of love. Cambridge Quarterly of Healthcare Ethics, 24(3), 355–360.
Baumeister, R. F., & Bushman, B. J. (2020). Social psychology and human nature. Cengage Learning.
Hu, M., & Kong, X. (2023). Reactions to romantic relationship announcements in parasocial love and unrequited love. Psychology of Popular Media, 12(2), 219–230.