It is saddening, how all through our lives we tend to search for love, and never find that which we can call true love. At the end of the day, situations make us believe something else or someone is responsible for our travails. But if we can look deep within, we are often responsible for the things that come our way in our search for love, either through our actions or inactions.
In the book the brief wondrous life of Oscar Wao by Junot Diaz, Oscar, having found himself in a dilemma of choosing between two of his girl friends, made a decision that set a tone for a disastrous voyage of love. Having been deceived by sight, he went for Meritza, who at the point by every standard was more beautiful than Olga; he ended up making the worse decision of his life. At that point in their life of Oscar, he had to make a decision, who knows if he chose Olga maybe he would have had a fulfilling love life, and subsequently things would have turned out differently in his life. Shortly after his heartbreak, he experienced rejection, not that he was rejected, but he felt rejected as a result of the earlier experience, which subsequently affected his approach to girls he so much admired. Often time one has to consider the content of a container and reduce the emphasis on the looks of the container. Apparently what led to every of the life challenges he was going to face or faced was as a result of the deception of his sight. The decision to go for Melitza was based on her attractive looks.
As it turned out in the life of Oscar he grew to have more faith in the curse he believed his family was going through, he did not see himself as being responsible for the things he faced but blamed it on the curse. For the fact that he proved to the people around him that he was unable to decide for himself, opinions started coming, his sister’s friends will make suggestions and at times make fun of him, all in the bid to see him go out in search of love which he did not have. This grew worse that instead of celebrating his friends; he now was becoming jealous of them. It was funny that the things Oscar possessed that were assets and cherished ones at that, were used in making fun of him.
Instead of his pride in the fact that he was a virgin, and more morally sound than his sister and the friends, they made him feel bad that he was not as morally loosed as they were. Nothing leaves a man scared in life like when he refuses to forgive his past. He never forgot his past, but held unto it and believed it was responsible for his present life and true to his words, the event shaped a good deal of his life. Funnily Olga, who was supposed to feel rejected and scared for life eventually became the toast of New Jersey. The fact that she was able to let go of the event and move on with her life speaks volumes of the quality of life and the principles on which she operated. And who knows, what quality of a partner Oscar would have had if he went for Olga as his girlfriend. But we never know, love in itself is filled with betrayers. It is only important that we let go of past events in our lives to move on in life successfully.